The Days That Changed Everything
by JBS-Forever
Summary: Six and a half months. That's how long it took Darry to get them back. One hundred and ninety-five days. Four thousand six hundred and eighty hours. Sixteen million eight hundred and forty eight thousand seconds...that changed everything.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey hey. This is a preview of the new story I'm going to be starting soon. **

**Let me know if you like the idea! If not, I have plenty more =)**

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It's a strange thing. Knowing when something is your fault, yet…not accepting it. Not admitting it. That was exactly how Darry felt when his brothers were taken away. He had screwed up, as much as he hated to say it, to even think it. He knew it was true though. He had made a mistake and it cost him; Ponyboy and Soda had been sent away. First to the state, then to separate families. Darry fought and fought to make his case until one day the court found him worthy enough of taking care of his brothers again.

Six and a half months. That's how long it took Darry to get them back. One hundred and ninety-five days. Four thousand six hundred and eighty hours. Sixteen million eight hundred and forty eight thousand seconds. Time that felt like an eternity without the only two people he had left in his life. And sure, Two-Bit and Steve were with him the whole fight, standing beside him in the battle, but they weren't his family. They weren't his brothers.

It was hell while they were gone. You didn't need to know Darry that well to see it on his face. He was devastated, destroyed. Soda and Ponyboy were his life. Two-Bit and Steve stayed close, making sure someone was in the house with him. Darry had punched his fist through a wall in the hallway. They didn't want it happening again.

It was a series of long embraces when the two returned. Ponyboy and Soda, Soda and Darry, Steve and Soda, Two-Bit and Pony. But most importantly, Pony and Darry. Ponyboy held on like he never wanted to let go. And they both cried. Just like when Ponyboy had run away and Darry broke down and told him he was scared he'd lost him. Soda joined in the hug and the three brothers cried together. Six and a half months of pain and sorrow.

The boys were changed. Darry could see the spark returning back to Soda's eyes the moment he ran through the door, but it wasn't as strong as before; It was slowly coming back. Ponyboy was quieter. After they all calmed down, he stood in the hallway and stared at the hole in the wall. Darry watched him from the living room while they all talked. Soda watched him too. Finally Darry had to pull him away, telling him it was ok, he wasn't hurt when he punched it. Ponyboy met his look, sadness in his eyes, and glanced back at the hole one more time before coming into the living room.

That night was hell for all of them. Ponyboy's nightmares were back and they were violent. Soda and Darry had both run from their rooms the moment he started screaming, fearing someone had broken in. But they were met with heartbreaking realization. Ponyboy cried into Soda's arms and it took both Soda and Darry most of the night to calm him down. They all ended up falling asleep in the living room after hours of talking.

Something, that to this day he still doesn't know what, woke Darry at five that following morning. He stretched his neck to relieve some of the stiffness only to find a figure standing by the window. A split second later, he discovered who that figure was. Ponyboy. Darry stood up and walked over to him. Soda was still asleep on the couch.

"Pone?" He asked cautiously, quietly. "You ok?"

Ponyboy looked over at him, the moonlight reflecting off his face. He simply nodded and turned away again. Darry put a hand on his shoulder and Ponyboy's world seemed to come crumbling down. He wrapped his arms around Darry's waist and hugged him tight. Darry wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close. He knew that if Ponyboy was openly showing affection to him like this, something was seriously wrong. He just didn't know what.

It didn't take long for Pony and Soda to fall back into their normal actions. Soda started sleeping with Pony again to ease his nightmares. The only success he achieved was that Pony no longer screamed bloody murder. He moaned and cried throughout the night though, which tore Soda to pieces.

Soda didn't joke around as much as he used to. He was still his charming self, with something that seemed a little more grown up inside him. Within the first three days he was home, he seemed to loosen up, as did Pony, and the adult started to fade. It was there though, something that Darry, Two-Bit, and Steve noticed whenever Soda could have a made a comment and didn't, could have jumped with joy and only smiled, could have laughed at something but didn't seem to get it. Darry hoped enough time at home would bring him back to normal.

Soda told them a lot about the house he had stayed at. The dog, the parents, the little baby sister. The family wanted to take him in because they heard his case and wanted him to have a nice place to stay, whether he was returned to Darry or not. They liked having an older boy help around the house too. Soda said the lady would have him help with the baby and that she always ended up laughing hysterically when Soda put the diaper on sideways. He didn't talk much about the dad. Darry didn't question it.

Ponyboy didn't want to talk about where he had stayed very much at all. The most anyone knew was that there was a mom and her boyfriend. They had a two story house and a big backyard. They had another son who was Soda's age. Ponyboy didn't like him much at first, but they grew closer.

One thing that had changed about Ponyboy was his fear of the dark. For the first few days, neither of the older brothers could figure out why Pony was so restless at night. Until one day, Soda forgot to shut off the light in the hall and Ponyboy had fallen asleep within minutes. So now the hall light stayed on, and on random nights, Soda would wake up to find Ponyboy reaching towards the light. Soda didn't know if Pony knew he did this in his sleep.

Pony didn't know if Soda knew he cried in his sleep. Usually Soda slept like a log, but for a few minutes each night, he would shift restlessly and when Pony looked at him, there were tears on his face. Pony didn't bring it up. If it didn't affect Soda when he was awake, he didn't want to bring it to his attention.

It was clear it would take some time for everything to fall back into place. Darry wasn't going to rush it. He'd help his brothers as much as he could, but it didn't keep him, Steve, and Two-Bit from wondering what happened in those one hundred and ninety-five days. Those four thousand six hundred and eighty hours. Those sixteen million eight hundred and forty eight thousand seconds.

The days that changed everything.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! A lot of positive responses. How awesome. Thank you guys so much!**

**I made a preview/trailer for this on youtube! **

**You can go to my profile page to get the link, or go to youtube and type in "The Days That Changed Everything (The Outsiders)" and you'll find it.  
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**Hope you all continue to enjoy :)**

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Steve was the first to notice it. That was probably what Darry found so weird about it, but it was true. He had asked Soda, who hadn't noticed it at all. Neither had Two-Bit. When they became aware of it, though, none of them could deny it: Ponyboy wouldn't walk in the backyard. Not just that, he wouldn't go anywhere near it. He'd go out of his way to stay clear of it, and when the gang was playing football there instead of the front yard, he'd stay in the house.

Soda tried asking him about it one day, but Pony claimed he didn't know what he was talking about. There was nothing more said. Darry figured there was something back there that Pony didn't want to be around, but no one could figure out what. Eventually, they just decided if they wanted Ponyboy to join them, they wouldn't go back there.

One thing that didn't seem to change was Darry. He was on the edge and everyone knew it. He looked overly stressed, like any moment he would just burst. He tried to make sure one of his brothers was home whenever he was and always made sure he knew where they were.

"You know, Dar," Soda said one day in the kitchen, "We ain't gonna disappear."

Darry didn't reply. He just patted Soda on the back and walked away.

Pony seemed to become hyper aware of this problem. He stayed around Darry when he was home and always made sure to tell him where he was going and when he would be back. That didn't happen often though. Ponyboy didn't really leave the house unless persuaded by one of the guys. Soda wondered if he had the same fear of being away from Darry as Darry had of being away from him.

Soda couldn't sleep anymore. At night, he'd lie awake and listen to Ponyboy breathe, a constant reminder that he was back home. When Ponyboy would start to moan and mumble in his sleep, Soda would roll over and throw an arm across him, pulling him closer. Sometimes he'd try to make out what Ponyboy was saying, but it didn't always make sense. Other nights, if touch didn't calm Pony down, he'd shake him awake to save him from the terrors haunting him.

For the first time, well…ever, the two brothers didn't tell each other what was wrong. Pony knew something was wrong with Soda. Soda knew something was wrong with Pony. But when they'd talk for hours in the darkness of their room, neither would bring up the subject.

It was tearing Darry apart. Knowing that there was something bothering his little brothers, but not knowing what. All he could think about was blame. None of this would have happened if he had been smarter. His brothers never would have been taken away. And things wouldn't be the way they were.

It was one of those days. It was warm outside and everyone was off work. Darry decided to barbeque while the gang played some football in the yard. Ponyboy chose to sit the next round out and helped Darry instead. Two-Bit and Steve both noticed how clingy he was becoming, but they didn't say anything.

That's when something weird happened. Two-Bit threw the ball to Soda, who caught it midair. Steve blindsided him with a tackle, knocking him flat on his back.

"Yeah!" Steve cheered, picking himself up. It was Ponyboy who noticed that Soda wasn't getting up though. He grabbed Darry and pointed quickly. Darry looked over in confusion and noticed Soda laying on his back, gasping.

"Soda?" Steve asked, kneeling down. Two-Bit rushed over while Darry threw his tongs on the grill and raced over to join them.

"Move," He said, gently pushing Two-Bit aside and dropping to his knees. Soda seemed disoriented. He was no longer gasping, but now he didn't appear to be breathing at all. He was staring up at the sky with bleary eyes.

"What the hell?" Darry muttered. He waved his hand in front of Soda's face. "Sodapop?"

Soda seemed to snap out of it and sucked a breath in. His eyes focused on Darry's face, silently searching for something.

"Ouch," He mumbled after a second and slowly sat up. Steve sighed in relief.

"You ok, little buddy?" Darry asked. Soda nodded.

"Just got the wind knocked out of me."

Darry eyed him suspiciously. "Go inside and let me check your back."

"Dar, I'm fine," Soda insisted. But Darry made him go. Without anyone noticing, Pony had managed to sneak inside to check on Soda before anyone came in. To his surprise, he found Soda in the bathroom, gripping the sides of the sink. His head was bowed and he was breathing hard, his knuckles turned white. Pony approached slowly, almost fearful.

"Soda?" He asked quietly.

Soda didn't look up at him. "Go."

"But…Soda…"

"Leave!" Soda snapped. Ponyboy backed out quickly and shoved past Darry, who was entering with Two-Bit and Steve. Darry gave them a confused look and went to find Soda.

Ponyboy sulked for the rest of the day, even after Soda had apologized. It wasn't just that he snapped at him. It was because Pony knew what was on Soda's shoulder that he didn't want Darry to see. And, because Darry had only pulled up Soda's shirt to look at his mid back, he didn't see it. Just like Soda wanted.

Pony also knew that Soda wasn't aware he'd seen it either. But Soda didn't always sleep with a shirt on. And one night, Ponyboy had woken up and couldn't get back to sleep. He rolled over to try and change positions and noticed something on Soda's shoulder. He never asked about it though. He was too terrified.

Soda was genuinely sorry. So much so, that he literally begged Ponyboy to forgive him after dinner. Ponyboy had said it was no big deal, but Soda knew he was still hurt. He rarely ever snapped at his little brother. He wished he could say he didn't know what possessed him to do it, but he knew exactly why he did. It had nothing to do with Pony. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Later that night when everyone went to bed, Soda laid awake again. He was beginning to be able to tell the difference in Pony's sound of breathing, telling him whether he was asleep or awake. It was obvious this time, even with his back to Soda.

"Pone?" Soda whispered into the darkness.

"What?"

"I'm real sorry, Pone."

Ponyboy was quiet for a moment. "I know."

He fell asleep not long after, leaving Soda to listen to his breathing again. Soda drifted off, but was awoken what felt like a second later. In reality, it had been hours. Soda figured that out quickly because it was only after a certain amount of time that Pony would start dreaming.

It was one of the bad nights. Where Ponyboy would shift restlessly in his sleep, crying and moaning words. He'd kick his legs, trying to get the covers off of him with no success. Soda didn't bothering trying to comfort him in his sleep. He shook him, calling his name.

Ponyboy opened his eyes and immediately stopped moving. Soda asked if he was ok, waiting a moment for him to comprehend the question. Ponyboy pushed himself into a sitting position, wiping his eyes. Soda sat up too and was instantly pulled into an embrace as Ponyboy cried. Soda held him tightly as he spoke through his tears.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Soda didn't need to ask what he meant. He knew exactly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Glad you guys are liking this! I hope you still are**. **Love all the reviews. They make my world. **

**I also started noticing/realizing random things in The Outsiders movie that I'm thinking about mentioning every once and while and seeing if someone else noticed.**

**For example, I never realized that Johnny and Sodapop are the same age in the book. Also, When Darry is telling Ponyboy he's not sure he wants him in the rumble, in the background, Two-Bit slides off his shoe, sets a can of beer in it, then takes off his other shoe and balances it on top of the can.**

**Yeah, I'm weird. :)**

**Enjoy.**

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Things were…tense. Ponyboy was upset with Sodapop for not telling Darry. But no matter how bad he felt about it, Soda still didn't tell him. Something was stopping him, and Ponyboy wasn't sure what it was. So he didn't say a thing. He didn't have room to talk, according to Soda.

But Ponyboy didn't care. Soda stopped taking care of himself, and it wasn't long before someone besides Pony noticed. Steve was the next person. It was one day at work that brought up his worry and made Steve watch him more carefully. It was a silent communication, but he knew that Pony had known about it too. Soda ate less, slept less, and laughed less. Something was weighing on his heart, but something was stopping Ponyboy and Steve from doing anything about it.

Ponyboy's clinginess to Darry only grew worse. He hung around him anytime he could. Whether Darry was in the kitchen making food or in his chair reading the paper. Ponyboy didn't notice it much, but everyone else did. It was something that secretly worried all of them.

At dinner, Ponyboy would shoot looks at Sodapop that Darry would miss. They were disappointed looks, agitated looks. Soda would look down at his food or start up a conversation, trying to avoid it. If Darry noticed, he didn't say anything. He was either too busy or too oblivious to see what was happening around him. Maybe he didn't want to admit it to himself.

Admitting it would only bring it back to his attention that everything that had changed was because it was his fault. It was his fault Ponyboy's nightmares were back, his fault Sodapop lost some of the shine to him, and his fault why they had been separated and now were desperate to hang onto each other. No matter how many times they tried to reassure him that it was just a fluke, just an accident, Darry didn't believe them. It didn't matter now, they would try to persuade, it was over and done with.

"Hey Dar?" Ponyboy asked him from the kitchen, snapping him from his thoughts.

"Yeah?" He set a plate down in front of Sodapop in the dining room.

"What's an underdog?"

Darry met him by the stove, grabbing another plate. "A social outcast. Why?"

Ponyboy piled food onto his plate, seeming a bit concerned. "Are we underdogs?"

"Nah," Darry said. "Underdogs have no status in society. Like Socs."

Ponyboy smiled, but it didn't ease his tension. Later, when Darry wasn't around, he asked Soda. Sodapop had replied the same, telling him they weren't social outcasts, they were just misunderstood. They were outsiders.

"Where'd you learn that word, kiddo?" Sodapop asked him. Ponyboy merely shrugged and went to go get ready for bed.

"Heard it at the house I stayed in."

Sodapop followed him, standing at the doorway of the bathroom while he brushed his teeth. "Yeah? Who was an underdog?"

Ponyboy spit in the sink and looked at himself in the mirror. He didn't answer Sodapop's question, but there was enough in what he didn't say to know what he should've said. Sodapop took a step closer.

"Did someone say that to _you_?" He asked. Ponyboy shrugged.

"Yeah. It's no big though."

"Wait." Sodapop grabbed his arm as Pony went to move around him. "That is big, Ponyboy. Was it that kid, the son? Jacob or whatever his name is?"

"No, it wasn't Jacob. His dad brought it up. Just don't worry about it."

But Sodapop did. He started piecing things together, and by the way Ponyboy acted about it, he knew that Pony believed it was true. He brought it up to Darry before he went to bed, trying to explain that the dad Ponyboy had lived with had clearly forced the idea into Ponyboy's head that he was worthless, that he was nothing. To say Darry was mad was an understatement. Just because he had lost Ponyboy didn't mean he should've been sent to a house where they treated him bad. Deep down, Darry knew it wasn't just making him believe he was worthless that was the only thing that happened there. He knew it for both Ponyboy and Soda.

So he finally decided to ask what happened. He had let both his brothers keep their silence about the houses and people they stayed with, but curiosity overrode his thoughts. He asked Sodapop first, and with no success. Sodapop claimed nothing happened, that he just missed being away from home. Darry knew it was a lie and Soda knew he wasn't buying it. He wasn't ready though, and he couldn't tell Darry that. He wouldn't understand.

Darry asked Ponyboy next, that night, when he brought up what Soda had told him. He asked Ponyboy if someone had given him the idea that he was an underdog, that he was a nothing. Ponyboy denied the thought though, telling him he was just curious because he didn't know what the word meant. Another brother, another lie. He cautiously went forward, asking Ponyboy not if anything had happened, but _what_ had happened. He figured if he implied it without knowing, Ponyboy would assume he did and confess everything.

But it didn't work. Ponyboy kept his shield up, only lowering it a bit to confess that the son, Jacob, had been rude when they first met. Jacob was a teen rebelling against everything that made him a teen. He didn't like Ponyboy because he didn't know him. But Ponyboy befriended him and not long after grew to understand him too.

It was the most Darry could get from him, but he accepted it. He'd work his way into more information. That he could do with Ponyboy, but not with Soda. With Soda it was different. Soda held in his emotions until he exploded. It had happened before, when his girlfriend Sandy had written him a "Dear John" note and he couldn't handle the pressure of being pulled in two directions by the only two family members he had left. Darry didn't know when it would happen, but he was hoping he could stop it before it did.

That night, when Sodapop laid down and listened through the darkness of the room, he spoke again.

"Ponyboy?"

"Huh?" Pony mumbled. Soda rolled onto his side, looking at his little brother.

"You ain't one."

"One what?" Ponyboy asked, half asleep.

"An underdog."

"'Kay."

"I'm serious, Pone," Soda persisted. "You ain't a nothing. You ain't worthless."

"Sure, Sodapop. I know. Night."

Sodapop sighed. Ponyboy fell asleep not long after and left him to his thoughts. He knew how much words hurt. They stung, especially when they were intended to. He'd gotten enough verbal abuse to understand it, and to know that Ponyboy was more sensitive than he was. Soda never believed what anyone said when it was bad, but Ponyboy took it to heart. While Soda had been gone, someone had physically tried to engrave the message into him. He believed it then, in those moments, in that place, but when he got home, it all faded away. He had doubts, every once and awhile, but for the most he was moving on.

Though now, he wasn't so sure.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry this one is short. **

**Here's another thing I noticed I noticed in the movie. When Darry is telling Ponyboy not to smoke more than a pack, Soda comes into the scene and Steve has to remind him that he's not wearing shoes. So he runs off and grabs them and runs out the door after Darry (You all probably noticed that one, haha) :)**

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"Ponyboy?"

Darry never figured out why he walked into the kitchen that night and found Ponyboy sitting alone at the table, tears running down his face. He flipped the dining room light on and sat down next to him.

"What's wrong?"

Ponyboy just wiped at his face, not looking at him. Darry sighed and put a hand on his shoulder. It was late, somewhere around two in the morning, and he had gotten up to use the bathroom when he found his little brother.

"Where's Sodapop?"

"Sleeping," Ponyboy told him quietly. Darry knew what that meant. It meant that Ponyboy had snuck out of the room in order to not wake Soda, so no one would see him crying. Darry sighed again. Inside, he knew it had something to do with everything that happened. He knew it was his fault and he couldn't stop blaming himself. No one else blamed him, but it was all he could think about. What if he had lost them for good?

"You're having nightmares again," Darry stated obviously. Ponyboy nodded.

"What about?"

"I dunno," Ponyboy sighed, leaning his elbow onto the table and running a hand back through his hair. "It's all jumbled up."

"What do you mean?"

"It just…" Ponyboy bit his lip, looking beside Darry at the wall. "I can't explain it. I remember colors, sounds that don't make no sense. It's like I feel like I remember what it's about, but I can't put it into words."

Darry stared at him for a long moment. Finally he pushed back his chair and stood up. "All right, c'mon."

Ponyboy looked up at him in confusion, running the back of his hand across his nose. "Huh?"

"You're staying with me tonight," Darry said, motioning for him to get up. Ponyboy gave him a skeptic look for a moment, but stood regardless. He followed Darry down the hall and into his dark room. Once Darry got into bed, he could hear Pony hesitate for a second before pulling back the covers and climbing in on the other side.

"Goodnight," Darry said, breaking the silence.

Ponyboy took a breath, sounding slightly uncomfortable. "Night."

Darry smirked into the darkness. That night, Ponyboy slept soundly, nightmare free.

XxXxX

"Just get _out_!"

It was the sound of yelling that woke them both the next day. Early, before anyone in the house was usually awake. It made Darry jump out of bed, moving faster than Ponyboy had ever seen him move. Because the person yelling was Sodapop and Sodapop didn't yell.

A scene of confusion is what met the two brothers because in the living room stood Steve, the last person Sodapop would ever be yelling at. The lamp was on the floor, glass shattered around it, and Sodapop was standing with his body tense, a look of fury in his eyes.

"Sodapop," Darry said slowly, cautiously staying a few feet away from both him and Steve. "What happened?"

Steve looked just as shocked as everyone felt. Something was wrong with Sodapop. He was never this angry, never this serious and tense. He didn't answer Darry's question. He just turned his back to everyone and spoke over his shoulder .

"Nothing. Steve was just leaving."

The tone of his voice made Ponyboy step back and Sodapop disappeared out the door. No one moved for what felt like a long time, but was only a few seconds.

"Steve?" Darry asked to the boy who was still in shock. "What was that?"

"Hell man," Steve ran his hand back through his hair. He was shaking. "He just exploded. I don't even remember what I said. It's like some demon possessed him or something. He broke the lamp and started demanding me to leave and then started yelling."

"Just out of nowhere?" Darry was leaning down, picking up the big pieces of glass.

"Yeah. He was all normal and then just snapped." Steve threw himself down on the couch. "What happened to him, Darry?"

Darry looked up, but it wasn't Steve he looked at. It was Ponyboy. "I dunno, Steve. But I'm gonna figure this out."

When Sodapop returned later, Darry noticed that Ponyboy wouldn't go very close to him. It wasn't until they realized that he wasn't angry anymore that Ponyboy became more relaxed. And that night, Ponyboy went back to sleeping with him again.

But Darry couldn't figure out what happened. Steve didn't come back to the house that day and must have warned Two-Bit not to come by, because he didn't show either. Darry cornered Sodapop alone and spoke to him calmly, asking what had made him so upset. Sodapop wouldn't tell him the truth though and it only made Darry grow more frustrated. He questioned Ponyboy, wanting to know what reason Sodapop had told him, but still he couldn't figure it out.

Sodapop dropped it. Steve forgave him and dropped it too. But Ponyboy and Darry didn't. They'd bring it up to each other occasionally, but never to their brother. Sodapop went back to his happy self and everyone pretended like it never happened. He bought a new lamp and replaced it while Darry was at work. He joked around with Steve and Two-Bit like he used to. Darry still noticed, though, that Ponyboy was cautious around him, as if waiting for him to start yelling again. Two-Bit noticed it too.

He asked Ponyboy if there was some reason he was afraid of Sodapop. Ponyboy had laughed it off, telling him he was crazy. And that's when Darry really began to notice something was off. He finally began to notice that Ponyboy was as clingy as everyone told him. That for some reason unknown to anyone, Ponyboy had actually been _terrified _of his loving brother. That Sodapop had yelled at his best friend for no reason, something he'd never done before. That he was suddenly lying and hiding something from Darry, which wasn't like him at all. And now Darry had this underlining fear that Sodapop's outburst was only the first part of something worse that was going to happen. He could just feel it inside of him.

If only he knew then that he was exactly right.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks everyone! Here's another chapter for you.**

**And another thing I noticed in the movie. Ponyboy mumbles "that's Johnny and Dallas both" before he passes out**.

**Am I the only one who never picked that up before? haha.**

**Enjoy.**

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It was just a bad night for Ponyboy. He had burnt his hand on the stove, dropped and shattered a glass plate in the dining room, stubbed his toe on the coffee table, and ended up going to bed early just to make the horrible luck stop. But it didn't. Because that night, he dreamt again.

A mixture of muffled sounds and swirling colors. The confusion and motion made Ponyboy start to feel sick. Someone was yelling at him, but he couldn't make out what they were saying. It sounded familiar; the voice, the sound. Something he didn't want to remember. He couldn't get away from it no matter how hard he tried. And it wasn't until he was woken up screaming sometime later that he escaped.

It was Sodapop who had woken him up. First he was asked if he was ok, and while the question settled into his head, he felt a more urgent need rise. He flipped back the covers and sat up quickly. Ignoring his brother, he raced out into the hallway and then threw himself down in front of the toilet just in time to start puking.

He hadn't realized that everyone was still awake and still at his house. The voices in the living room fell silent and the only sounds were coming from the radio, the TV, and the boy throwing up in the bathroom. Darry had hurried over the moment Ponyboy started, sitting on the edge of the tub and waiting for him to finish. Sodapop stood in the doorway and watched with worried eyes. When Ponyboy was done, he sat back on his heels and wiped at the tears that had filled his eyes and began to fall.

"Pone, you ok?"

He nodded. Someone handed him a rag and he cleaned up his face, flushing the toilet after. He stood on shaky legs and Darry grabbed his arm to help steady him before walking back to his room with him. He climbed into bed and Darry turned out the light, lingering around for a moment.

"You sure you're ok?"

Ponyboy closed his eyes and buried his face further into his pillow. "Yeah, Dar."

"All right. Goodnight."

"Night."

Though Darry knew it wasn't true, he let it go. He pulled Sodapop aside to ask him what had happened. Sodapop had told him the truth: Ponyboy had started moaning and screaming in his sleep, so he had woken him up. Ponyboy started to look pale and sick and then ran to the bathroom. That was all that Sodapop knew.

He wound up going to bed early too, fearing Pony might be getting sick. For some reason, it seemed like the worst thing that could happen to his little brother. Ponyboy was known for speaking deliriously when he was sick. Sodapop wasn't sure he wanted to hear what he would say.

That night Ponyboy only woke Sodapop up once. He had been mumbling in his sleep, too low for Soda to understand. It was when he started twisting himself in the blankets that Soda had woken him up, though he hadn't really come to consciousness. Just enough to roll over and fall quiet again. It was enough for Sodapop and he fell asleep soon after.

It was nearly five when Sodapop woke again, alone. He stumbled out in the dark hallway to find where Ponyboy was and saw the light from the bathroom flooding into the darkness. He walked that direction and stopped in the doorway, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes. Ponyboy was laying on his side on the floor, appearing to be asleep. Sodapop kneeled down by his little brother and put a hand on his back.

"Pone?"

Ponyboy didn't move. "Hmm?"

"You ok?"

"Mhmm."

Soda chuckled softly. "Then why're you sleeping on the bathroom floor?"

"Was sick," Ponyboy mumbled. Sodapop rubbed his back absentmindedly.

"Are you still sick?"

Ponyboy shook his head.

"Then let's get you back to bed."

"No," Pony muttered. "I'll stay here."

"You wanna stay on the bathroom floor?" Soda asked skeptically, a smile playing on his lips.

"Mhmm. Too tired."

"C'mon, Pone," Sodapop prodded. "You'll feel better when you're laying on a bed."

Ponyboy groaned, but slowly got up anyway. Sodapop helped him back to the room, stopping him from falling into the wall as he walked drowsily. He drew back the covers when they got to the bed and Ponyboy climbed in, collapsing against his pillow.

"Soda?" He mumbled sleepily.

"Yeah?"

"Love you."

Soda got into bed on the other side and pulled the blankets up. "Love you too, kiddo. Now go to sleep."

XxXxXxXxX

"Dar?" Sodapop had stuck his head in the door later that morning, waking his oldest brother. Darry, who's senses seemed heightened while he slept, rolled over quickly.

"Yeah?"

"Um…" Sodapop shifted on the balls of his feet, looking at the floor. Darry sat up and ran a hand over his face. He let his vision clear for a moment before he spoke again.

"What's wrong?"

Sodapop opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. His thoughts were jumbled for a few seconds. "I…well…and…I…"

"Sodapop, it's five thirty in the morning. What's going on?"

Sodapop shifted again and bit his lip. "I…um, I don't…"

Without any warning, he suddenly started crying, throwing Darry off guard. He wiped at the tears that refused to stop falling, his lips trembling as Darry threw back his covers and hurried over to him. Darry grabbed his shoulders, looking at him in concern.

"What's wrong little buddy?" He asked. Sodapop shook his head, as if he couldn't explain what was happening to himself, and the tears started pouring faster. Darry could sense he was nearing hysterics and wrapped him tightly in a bear hug, pulling him close.

"What's a matter, Sodapop?" He asked again, his voice heavy with worry. Sodapop's body shook. The last time Darry had really seen him cry was when Ponyboy had run away. Sodapop had slept in Pony's room every night he had been gone and seemed to have been able to cry at the drop of a hat whenever someone mentioned him. Darry hadn't seen Soda cry like that since, not even when they had been separated. They had all cried when they'd been reunited, but those tears were different.

"I'm scared, Dar," Sodapop whispered. Darry pushed him back and looked at him.

"Of what, Pepsi?" Darry used the old nickname to help comfort him. Sodapop wiped at his eyes again. He tried to take a few deep breaths before he began talking.

"Of me."

"What do you mean?" Darry asked in confusion.

Sodapop bit back a sob. "I can't make it go away, Darry." He broke down again and lifted his hands, trying to show Darry something that only he understood. He looked down at them and back up through his tears. "Please, Darry, _please _make it go away."

And Darry pulled him close once more. "I don't know what it is, Sodapop. But I'm gonna make it go away. It's gonna be ok. I promise."


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's another thing I noticed that is interesting: The Curtis family had a dog. It apparently died in the car with the parents. **

**Hmmmm ;)**

**Hope you guys enjoy :)**

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Steve and Two-Bit were told not to hang out the next day. Darry asked them to take Ponyboy some place and give him time to deal with his other brother. No one told Ponyboy what was going on because everyone knew he himself was in a fragile state. Darry didn't like keeping things from him that had to do with Sodapop, but he could only deal with one brother at a time. He didn't need Ponyboy worrying himself sick.

Sodapop slept in Darry's bed after his meltdown. Darry came in to check on him every once and a while, unable to go back to sleep himself. He didn't want to make it appear like he couldn't handle things, but he needed a little help. He called the lady from the state that had been assigned to him. He asked her to look into the houses that both Ponyboy and Sodapop had stayed at, telling her he had feelings something went on while his brothers were gone. She agreed when she heard about Sodapop's breakdown and Ponyboy's weird behavior.

He heard Sodapop let out a noise and got off the phone so he could go check on him. His face was twisted with something Darry couldn't exactly identify. It was a mixture of worry and fear, like something was there that he couldn't get away from. Darry woke him up and then asked him if he wanted anything to eat, trying to distract him a bit. It worked well enough for Darry's sake.

Once Sodapop was sitting down at the table, Darry questioned himself while he brought out food. For the first time, Sodapop was fragile; to the point of falling off the edge. Darry had never dealt with him like this and he wasn't sure what to say to not make it worse.

He sat down and carefully watched his little brother. After a few silent moments, he spoke. "So talk to me, Sodapop. Tell me what happened."

Sodapop didn't look up. He poked at his food with a weary look on his face. "Pony was sick last night."

"Ok…and?" Darry prodded.

"I came out and found him asleep in the bathroom. I couldn't get back to sleep."

"Why?"

"Do you remember the song mom would sing to us when we were little and sick? She'd sing it to us to make us feel better."

"I remember," Darry said.

"Ponyboy was singing it," Soda whispered. Darry gave him a confused look and he continued on. "He was kind of mumbling it after I got him back to bed."

"I'm surprised he remembers it," Darry muttered. "But what about it, Soda? What does that have to do with what happened last night?"

Sodapop flashed back in his mind. For a few moments, he was gone in the memories that had been haunting him since he'd come home. The memories he had been trying not to think of.

"Pepsi Cola?" Darry asked gently, moving to the seat next to him and putting a hand on his shoulder. Sodapop hadn't realized he'd been crying.

"I…I can't explain right now. I can't," Sodapop said desperately. "Please understand, Darry. I'm so…I'm so..."

"I wanna help you, Sodapop, but I gotta know what's going on before I can do that. What happened at that house you stayed in?"

"Bad things," Sodapop whispered. "The dad…he would throw Emma into the bathroom when she was sick and leave her there all night."

"Emma…the baby?" Darry asked with raised eyebrows. Sodapop nodded. "He left her there alone?"

Soda nodded again. "I would sing to her from my room since the bathroom was next to it. You know, the song mom sang. Every time she cried I tried to get to her no matter where she was. And every time I tried…worse things started happening."

Darry held his breath. "Like…what?"

Sodapop burst into a fresh set of tears. "I was wrong, Darry. I'm sorry. Please don't be mad."

"Whoa whoa." Darry put an arm around his shoulders and pulled him close. "I ain't mad at you, Sodapop. What're you talking about being wrong?"

"I'm s-sorry," He said again, grabbing Darry tightly.

"It's ok," Darry said calmly, stroking his hair to soothe him. "It's ok. You didn't do nothing. Just relax."

"I h-hate it," Sodapop choked through his tears, nearly sobbing. "I h-hate what I-I'm becoming."

"Soda," Darry said gently, "What ever are you talking about?"

"I'm a monster," Soda whispered. Darry pushed him back and looked him in the eyes.

"You will _never _be a monster, Sodapop. Ever. You got that? You are a loving person and a wonderful brother."

Sodapop looked down, wiping at his eyes. "I j-just can't m-make the memories g-go away."

Darry sighed and pulled him close again. "I wish you would just talk to me, little buddy. Tell me what happened to you."

XxXxXxX

Two-Bit and Steve had managed to keep Pony away from the house all day. When they got back though, Darry should've expected that he'd be curious to what happened. Sodapop was nowhere in sight, but still Ponyboy could tell something was up. He cornered Darry.

"What's wrong with Soda?" Ponyboy asked him in the kitchen. Darry sighed and set down a plate next to the pan he had been cooking in. He knew he couldn't candy coat things with him, but he wasn't sure what was going on.

"Sodapop's…not well right now," Darry said. "He's dealing with some stuff."

"What?" Ponyboy asked.

"I ain't…" Darry sighed again and looked at him. "Pone, he went through some stuff while he was away and it's just getting to him now. He just needs some time and some love, ok?"

Ponyboy looked a little scared, but he nodded. Darry decided now was as good as time as ever to talk to him. He told Ponyboy to come with him and they sat down at the table, the food for dinner still waiting in the kitchen.

"It's time we talk, too."

"About?" Ponyboy wondered.

Darry drummed his fingers on the table, a little uncomfortable. "You've been very…clingy lately, kiddo. Is there a reason for that?"

Ponyboy traced the patterns of the wood beneath his hand. Darry had noticed he started doing that when he didn't want to talk about something. He would get fidgety and avert his attention elsewhere. "I dunno what you mean."

"Yes, you do," Darry said. "What is it, Pone? What's bothering you? Did something happen to you at that house?"

"_Nothing_ happened!" Ponyboy stood up, sounding angry and defensive. "Nothing is bothering me, ok?" He lowered his voice, speaking normally again. "I'm gonna go bring the food out."

"Yeah…yeah, ok," Darry said in a bit of shock.

"What was that?" A voice asked the moment Ponyboy was out of the room. Darry looked over and saw Sodapop standing in the doorway of the bathroom. He shook his head. He didn't know what that was. Ponyboy didn't act like that and he couldn't explain why he was now.

XxXxXxXx

"Show me," Darry said again.

"I…"

"No excuses. You said you would, now show me."

"I'm scared," Soda said softly.

"Why? What is it exactly?"

Sodapop and Darry were standing in the bathroom. Sodapop had told him during his earlier break down that he couldn't explain why he was wrong, he'd have to show him how he knew. Darry wasn't sure what that meant, but while Ponyboy was out on the front porch talking to Two-Bit, he had pulled Sodapop aside.

"It's…it's nothing. Never mind, just forget about it."

"No." Darry grabbed Sodapop as he went to move by him. He softened his voice to a gentle tone. "Please, Sodapop."

Soda sighed and stepped back in front of the mirror. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths before grabbing the bottom of his shirt and pulling it off over his head. Darry didn't need to ask where it was, it was obvious. A big red mark on his shoulder. Darry stepped closer and noticed it had been burned into his skin from something that looked like a cigarette.

"Sodapop…" Darry whispered, tracing his fingers gently along it. Sodapop bit back his tears. On his shoulder had been burned five letters:

W.

R.

O.

N.

G.

Wrong.

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_Sodapop picked up the phone in his room, but it was dead. With tears running down his face, he threw it angrily. His shoulder felt like it was on fire. All he'd done was try to get to Emma, though he had nearly shoved the dad down the stairs for leaving her in the bathroom for the hours he had. In return, he had burned Sodapop in an attempt to teach him that trying to help Emma was "wrong" and he would have to learn his lesson. He locked Sodapop in his room after. All Soda wanted to do was call Darry, but he wasn't allowed to. The dad left him stuck in there until mid afternoon the next day. _


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for the reviews!**

_**ReaderOfYourStory**_**, the boyfriend is Jacob's dad. **

**Again...I really need to point out that Ponyboy and Sodapop's personalities are different than in The Outsiders because they've been through traumatic events. Ponyboy is especially fragile because of...well, the things that happened to him. ****I'm a little afraid posting this chapter because of how he acts. ****I just would like you all to remember he's young and sensitive, haha. Eek :S**

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The thunder woke Ponyboy up that night. His room was dark, the hall light having not been left on. Sodapop was not beside him and he felt terrified. A crack of lightening made the room light up and Ponyboy froze. A shovel was leaning again the wall by the door. When the next flash happened, the door began slowly opening.

"S-Sodapop?" Ponyboy was almost too terrified to speak. The door kept moving until it was all the way open and the next flash showed Ponyboy a figure in black standing in the doorway. It wasn't Sodapop. It was the guy from the house he had stayed in. And because he was so scared, he couldn't yell for help.

"I told you," The guy said. "I told you not to and you know what happens now."

Ponyboy's eyes grew wide. He tried to control his breathing. The man couldn't be there. It wasn't possible. "No…"

"Get the shovel."

Ponyboy shook his head and backed himself into the wall behind his bed. "I don't wanna."

The room lit up as the man took a step forward. "You're making this worse for yourself. Now do as I say."

"No," Ponyboy said a bit more strongly, even though he was trembling something fierce. The thunder shook everything around him. He couldn't breathe.

"You _will_ do as I say or else there will be consequences. You knew the punishment, now get up or I will make you."

Ponyboy shook his head again and kept trying to back himself up. Lightening struck and Ponyboy saw the man start to approach him quickly, bringing the shovel with him.

"NO!" Ponyboy screamed, covering his eyes with his arm.

"PONE!"

His eyes shot open and he found himself lying down in his bed, a concerned face above his. The light in the hallway was on and shining enough into his room to let him make out that face as Sodapop. His blankets were in a tangled heap at the floor and the shovel that had been against the wall in his dream was no longer there.

"Breathe," Sodapop said softly. Ponyboy took a deep breath and tears of relief started flowing from his eyes.

"What is it, Pone?" Soda asked. Ponyboy sat up and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.

"Just…glad it ain't real," He muttered. His skin felt hot beneath his hands.

"What'd you dream of?" Soda wondered, putting the back of his hand on Ponyboy's forehead to check his temperature. Ponyboy looked at him silently for a moment.

"You showed him, didn't you?"

Soda gave him a questioning look and moved his hand away. "Showed who what?"

"Darry. You showed him….your shoulder, didn't you?"

Sodapop sighed deeply and sat back on his heels. "Yeah, I did. How'd you know?"

"I heard you guys in the bathroom." Ponyboy sniffed and wiped his nose again. "What's it from, Sodapop? What happened?"

"Kid…" Sodapop sighed. "Listen, some things went on at that house and you have a right to know, just…not now, ok? You're getting sick and you've been through enough of your own stuff."

"But Soda…"

"Ponyboy, no. I ain't…I ain't ready to talk about it just yet, ok? You need to understand that."

Ponyboy nodded, a few tears escaping from his eyes. "Ok."

Sodapop squeezed his shoulder and grabbed his blankets off the ground. He threw them back on the bed and moved to get around on the other side.

"Answer me something," He said.

"What?"

"Why're you afraid of the dark all the sudden?"

"I…" Ponyboy bit his lip and thought about it. The lightening stuck in his mind. "I ain't…"

"Oh really?" Soda questioned skeptically, a smile on his face. "Then sleep with the light off."

Ponyboy shrugged. "Fine." He got up and flipped the hall light off, crawling into bed again after. He could feel himself trembling slightly, the darkness blending in with his nightmare. The stubbornness he got from being sick was overriding his senses.

"Pone," Sodapop sighed.

"Night Sodapop." Ponyboy rolled over, subconsciously pushing his blankets further away from him. It was silent for a few moments, Ponyboy shaking slightly and Sodapop kicking himself mentally. Finally Sodapop shifted onto his side and put a hand on Ponyboy's shoulder.

"C'mon, Pone. Turn the light back on," Soda said gently. "I'm sorry."

"I'm fine, Sodapop." Ponyboy sniffed.

Soda sighed again and got up. He flipped the light in the hall on and came back, throwing an arm over Ponyboy and pulling him close.

"Goodnight kid," He muttered.

XxXxXx

Darry and Sodapop were up early that morning, before Ponyboy was awake. Darry wanted answers, and he promised they could start off slow. He'd have Sodapop tell him as much as he felt comfortable with and the plan was to do this everyday until Sodapop eventually told him everything.

Before Sodapop had woken up, Darry had been on the phone for at least an hour, calling anyone and everyone he could to get something done about what he knew happened to Sodapop. He wasn't going to sit by and let this go. He called the lady from the state, who promised she would make some calls about this. Sending children to abusive homes wasn't ok. Sending his brother to an abusive home definitely wasn't ok, no matter what Darry did to lose him. He hadn't even cracked the surface with Ponyboy yet.

Sodapop had come out and told him that the first time the dad, James, had left Emma in the bathroom, he'd nearly punched him in the face. That, apparently, wasn't the first thing he had done to upset Sodapop, but he wouldn't explain anymore about that yet. He told Darry that James had locked him in his room after the first attempt. Yet Sodapop still tried to get out and help her. When Sodapop had gotten out and almost shoved James down the stairs, that's when he had been burned.

Sodapop wouldn't, or couldn't, go into details about how it happened. Darry knew it was from a cigarette, but he wasn't sure how James had forced Sodapop to keep still while he burned him repeatedly. Four times, Sodapop had told him. That was how many times he'd been burned.

Darry wanted to hunt this guy down, but unfortunately he had no idea where he lived, nor would Sodapop tell him. That confused Darry. Sodapop had said it simply when he asked.

"I ain't letting you do anything that could get us sent away from you."

Darry understood, but that didn't stop his desire to hurt the man who had hurt his brother. He would resist, strongly. It would never be ok, though. Darry was furious and it wasn't just with the guy. He wondered how they could let children go into houses that had people like that in them. If it wasn't for them, Sodapop would be fine. But then again, if it wasn't for himself, Sodapop never would have been sent away.

Sodapop granted permission to Darry to tell Steve and Two-Bit about what happened. Darry knew that was only because Sodapop knew they were worried. He told them later in the day when Sodapop had gone back to sleep. Darry was aware that he hadn't been sleeping well. He offered to have Ponyboy sleep with him so the nightmares wouldn't wake Sodapop up, but Soda declined, telling him he didn't mind taking care of him.

Ponyboy had been sleeping all day and Sodapop had informed Darry that he was starting to get sick, which was probably why he hadn't gotten up. So while Sodapop and Ponyboy slept, Darry sat with Two-Bit and Steve on the porch and told them what went on. To say the friends were shocked and angered was an understatement. They were both ready to start a search for James and hurt him. Darry had seriously told them he'd knock their heads off if they even tried. He warned them that anything they did could get Sodapop in trouble and taken away again. That was enough to make them back down.

Darry told them not to bring it up with Sodapop or Ponyboy. They were both in fragile states of mind and Darry didn't need either of the friends sending them over the edge. Sodapop was already standing on the ledge. He didn't know how close Ponyboy was to falling off.

XxX

Later that night, they were hit with a summer storm. It had started raining during dinner and both Sodapop and Darry didn't miss the way Ponyboy became anxious and fidgety. He was starting to look sick. His face was flushed and his eyes were puffy. He was quiet, too; a habit he had when he was sick and suffered in silence. Darry would've rather he complained like a normal person, but Ponyboy wasn't like that.

When everyone had gone to bed, Ponyboy laid awake and listened to the thunder. Sodapop had actually fallen asleep, something that Ponyboy had wished hadn't happened. He was scared, but he didn't want to wake Soda when he was finally sleeping. He stumbled out into the dark living room instead and turned the TV on.

The noise distracted him enough until he fell asleep. But later, when the station went off the air, a loud crack of thunder shook the house, in turn shaking Ponyboy to his core. He jolted awake and nearly screamed. Panic, mixed in with his sick and delirious mind, sent Ponyboy into a frenzy. His vision was foggy with tiredness. He tried to make his way back towards his room-no, Darry's room...or Soda's room. He wasn't sure where he was going. Lightning lit up his surroundings and every shadow in the house seemed to dance alive.

The thunder boomed again and Ponyboy sank to the floor in the hallway, cupping his hands over his ears and shutting his eyes tight. He was crying as he tried to block out the sound. Suddenly someone was shaking him and forcing his hands away.

"Ponyboy! It's ok!"

Ponyboy peaked open his eyes and found Darry on his knees in front of him. The thunder sounded off once again and Ponyboy jumped. He flung his arms around Darry and locked his hands tight together, burying his face in Darry's shoulder. Darry gripped him tight, his own heart racing.

"It's all right. It's just thunder, Pone," He said.

Ponyboy shook his head, his mind somewhere far deep in a flashback. "No, it's worse," He whispered. "Just no digging. Please, _please_."

Darry was beyond confused. It wouldn't be until sometime later that he'd understand just exactly what Ponyboy meant.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you guys SO much for the reviews. Each one honestly makes my day better.**

**This chapter is weird to me. Please excuse any mistakes. It was written over a long period of time in different locations and that usually ends up with mistakes.**

**Enjoy.**

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Sodapop woke up alone the next morning, worried. He knew Ponyboy was sick and he didn't know where he would go if he was delirious. Ponyboy could get like that when he was ill. Sodapop knew it wouldn't be the first time. But it didn't take long to find him. Ponyboy was curled up on the couch in the living room, his head resting on a pillow that was on Darry's leg. Darry's head was titled so the back of it was laying against the top of the couch, and both of them were asleep. Sodapop smiled a little. He quietly knelt down and felt Ponyboy's head, trying not to wake either of his brothers. Ponyboy was still feverish, and his goal of not waking anyone was failed.

"Hey," Darry groaned, stretching and rolling his neck.

"Hey," Soda said quietly. "What're you two doing out here?"

"Help me a sec," Darry motioned to him and they both carefully lifted the pillow up with Ponyboy's head on it, letting Darry slid out. Once he was free, he headed towards the kitchen, Sodapop in tow. "The storm scared him last night. I found him in the hallway. Hey, did he ever mention anything to you about digging?"

"Digging what?" Sodapop asked.

"I dunno, anything I guess. He was bawling last night and kept saying "just no digging. Please, no digging." I didn't know what he meant."

"Maybe he's just delirious," Soda suggested. Darry would've considered the thought if Ponyboy hadn't been so adamant about it. Darry had tried to reason with him and tell him he wouldn't make him dig anything, but Ponyboy kept saying it as though he didn't hear him. It took Darry a long time and a few distractions to finally make him stop.

When Ponyboy didn't even move to the sound of Darry dropping a pan on the kitchen floor, Sodapop had grown concerned again, forcing Darry to explain that Ponyboy was in a drugged sleep. Since he was sick anyway, Darry had given him nighttime medicine to put him out. It stopped his panic attack and let him get through the rest of the storm. Ponyboy wouldn't let Darry take him back to his room, so Darry had stayed out on the couch with him incase he woke up.

Filled with curiosity and concern, Sodapop had to ask why Ponyboy was afraid of a storm. He'd never been one to fear the sound of thunder. Darry couldn't explain it though. They both discussed possibilities, but nothing seemed to make sense. What could of happened at that house to make Ponyboy afraid of thunder and lightning? They weren't sure.

Steve and Two-Bit came over later when Darry was leaving for work and heard all about the tale. Two-Bit sat on the ground in front of the couch and watched TV, careful not to be too loud, while Sodapop and Steve talked in the kitchen. Two-Bit was concerned for Ponyboy. Sodapop noticed the way he became protective. Ponyboy had always been like a brother to Two-Bit and he would do anything to help him.

When Ponyboy awoke next, it was because of the front door slamming closed. He gasped and jolted awake, still groggy from sleep. Sodapop had to step into the room to let him know it was just Two-Bit and Steve leaving. He asked Ponyboy about what happened and why he was scared. Ponyboy wouldn't explain though. He seemed lost in thought about it, as though he didn't remember all the details. The answer would have to sit with Sodapop until he left for work a little later and Two-Bit returned.

Ponyboy slept on and off while he was there. Two-Bit would come into his room to check on him and ask if he wanted anything to eat, but he never did. Ponyboy wasn't one for eating when he was sick. Two-Bit had made him take his temperature and Ponyboy had moaned on and on about how he wasn't a baby and didn't need someone checking on him. When he'd nearly fallen in the hallway from being dizzy, it took all Two-Bit had not to say "I told you so".

When Darry got home, Sodapop was already back and Two-Bit was gone. Later, when he was making dinner in the kitchen, Sodapop came in with a sullen look on his face.

"Ponyboy's thirsty," He said.

Darry gave him a look while he closed the oven. "So get him some water?"

"Will _you_?"

"Why?"

"You know why," Sodapop said with a smile, making Darry sigh.

"Sodapop."

"It ain't my fault he's annoying when he's sick," Sodapop whined. "Please, Darry?"

Darry groaned and let out a frustrated noise. He opened the cupboard and grabbed a glass, filled it with water, and moved past Sodapop. He headed towards Ponyboy's room and walked inside. He couldn't deny that Sodapop was right. Ponyboy had a tendency to be rather annoying when he got to a certain stage of being sick. He was stubborn and unreasonable.

Darry handed Ponyboy the glass and asked how he was feeling. Ponyboy sat up to take a drink, claiming that he was fine. Darry expected that answer. Ponyboy didn't normally confess when he was feeling awful. Darry felt his forehead with the back of his hand, making Ponyboy close his eyes and sink back against his pillow. He was still burning up.

Darry left and came back with a cool washcloth. He made Ponyboy lay down before resting the cloth on his head, causing Ponyboy to close his eyes again and let out a long breath.

"Better?" Darry asked him. He nodded.

"Thanks," He whispered.

"No problem, kiddo. Call if you need anything."

He went back to the kitchen to finish cooking. Sodapop had disappeared somewhere. He was no longer in the house and didn't seem to be within ear shot. Darry figured one of the gang had stopped by and they went off to do something. He knew Sodapop would be back in time for dinner, so he didn't worry.

Ponyboy fell back asleep so Darry saved him something to eat in case he got hungry later. He was getting a plate out of the cupboard when he turned around and saw someone standing in the entry way. He jumped, not expecting to see anyone there, and nearly dropped the plate he was holding.

"Glory!" He said, catching his breath. It was Sodapop. The moment of relief was short lived when he actually looked at his brother. Soda's face was bruised, his clothes tattered and ripped. He didn't move from his spot as Darry examined him, but he lifted his hand up. Darry noticed blood on it.

"Soda, what happened?" Darry grabbed a dish towel and pulled Soda forward at the same time. He ran the towel under some water and started cleaning the blood away. Sodapop didn't speak. Darry glanced at him nervously, seeing the look on his face. He moved in front of him and tilted his head up.

"Sodapop."

"I…" Soda looked down again. "I got in a fight."

"With who?" Darry asked.

"Some soc." Soda pulled his hand back and stepped over to open the fridge.

"Was he messing with you?"

Soda stopped his rummaging for a second, but then continued as though he didn't hear Darry. He grabbed a bag of peas that no one ever ate and put it on the side of his face. Darry closed the fridge door and stepped in front of him again.

"Sodapop, what's going on?"

Soda finally sighed and closed his eyes. "I dunno, Dar. I just…I just kinda snapped."

"What do you mean?"

When Sodapop opened his eyes again, Darry could see the pain inside them. If he'd had any thought Sodapop had gotten better, it was washed away with that look. The reason that Sodapop was so shaken, he explained roughly to Darry, was because he'd started in on that Soc and couldn't stop. Not only that, but the Soc had merely said something in passing that made him upset. He hadn't been jumped, hadn't been pushed, hadn't had much of a reason alone to fight him. The Soc had one friend with him who'd tried to get Sodapop off the boy, but Soda punched him in the face, which made him ditch his Soc friend quickly.

When Sodapop had realized what he was doing, he dropped the Soc immediately and backed away. He wasn't sure if anyone else had been around. He walked home in a confused and upset daze, still feeling like he was becoming a monster.

"What's wrong with me?" He asked Darry broken heartedly.

"_Nothing_ is wrong with you, Sodapop," Darry said sternly.

Sodapop dropped his head into his hands and pulled at his hair. "I'm losing my mind, Darry. Losing it. I just get so angry and can't do nothing about it."

"Soda," Darry sighed. "You were stuck at a house with a dad who did things that made you mad and then forced you not to do anything about it. It's natural that you're feeling like this."

"But it ain't, Darry," Sodapop said desperately. "This time it was a soc, but what happens when I hurt someone I care about? What if I hurt Ponyboy?"

"Sodapop Curtis, you know you would never hurt someone you love, especially Ponyboy."

"He's scared of me," Soda whispered.

"He ain't scared of you," Darry tried to reason. "He's scared of… people yelling…and people being mad I guess."

Sodapop ignored him and shook his head, tears filling his eyes. "You said you would help me, Darry. You said you would make it go away. Please make it go away… before…before it becomes a part of me."

"It will never be a part of you, Sodapop. Never." Darry flung an arm over his shoulder and pulled him close. "We're gonna make this go away. I promise you."

"How, Darry? How?"

"Don't worry…I have an idea."

XxX

Darry tried to keep himself from yelling over the phone so Sodapop wouldn't hear. He sighed in frustration and peered around the corner of the hall to make sure neither of his brothers were awake and listening.

"There's no way in-" Darry cut himself off. "If you honestly expect me to pay when this was your own damn fault, then-"

"_Darrel, we're not asking you pay. We'll cover the charges. What's important is getting Sodapop better._"

"He won't get taken from me again, will he? They won't think that just cause he needs help means I'm not fit to be a guardian?"

"_No Darrel. We're administrating this because of something that was our fault. There's no way any judges are gonna see harm against you for it._"

"Will it…will it really be good for him?" Darry asked, his voice cracking.

"_We think it will be. It is for most of the people._"

"Most?"

"_Just don't worry, ok? We're gonna do everything we can for him._"

Darry nodded even though he was on the phone. "I'm trusting you. Please…don't let me lose my brother again."


	9. Chapter 9

**Wow! You guys are so amazing and nice! I love all your reviews! Seriously!**

**This chapter is a little choppy, but it's kinda supposed to be like that. **

**Please keep in mind that my Ponyboy is sick and in this state he acts a bit different. **

**Enjoy.**

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"I don't wanna go, Darry," Soda said broken heartedly. He wiped at the tears falling from his eyes as Darry put a hand on his shoulder.

"I promised I would help you, Sodapop. This is gonna make you better, ok?"

Sodapop nodded. Darry pulled him close and let out a sigh. "It's gonna be ok. I promise."

"I believe you," Sodapop whispered. He pushed back from Darry and wiped his nose. "When do I leave?"

"Next week."

"Does Ponyboy know?"

"No," Darry said. "I figure I'll tell him after you leave. That way I can just say you'll be back soon and he won't worry himself about it before you're gone."

"How long will I be gone?" Sodapop asked.

"Two weeks, Sodapop."

Sodapop burst into a fresh set of tears and tried quickly to wipe them away. Darry put a hand on his shoulder again and squeezed it gently.

"Don't be sad, little buddy."

"I'm sorry," Soda said shakily. "It's just…I-I don't wanna be…It's like…"

"I'm not losing you again, Sodapop," Darry said as though he knew what he was thinking. "It's not the same. You'll come home. Nothing bad is gonna happen."

"You promise?" Sodapop looked at him with wide eyes. Darry could see the despair shining through them.

"Yes. I promise."

XxX

Sodapop had been out at the lot a long while the next day, throwing a football back and forth with Steve. He told him all about where he was going and how long he would be gone. Steve didn't voice much of an opinion on it, just wished him luck and told him he agreed with Darry that it would be good. When Sodapop had started to grow upset about it again, Steve cracked jokes to make him feel better.

"Hey Dar!" Sodapop called as he came into the house and slid his coat off. "You home?"

It was quiet for a second before Darry answered back. "Yeah…c'mere a second."

Sodapop let concern wash over his face as he started towards the dining room where he had heard Darry. His voice was different and something about it made Sodapop worried. He found Darry sitting at the table, his face empty of emotion, like he was beyond being able to understand what he should feel.

"Dar?" Sodapop asked quietly.

"Sit down, Sodapop."

Soda sat in the seat next to him. "What's wrong?"

"I got a call today," Darry started, letting out a soft breath. "From the state."

Sodapop felt fear rise in his chest. He could barely move. "What happened?"

"It's about the house you stayed at." Darry turned to look at Sodapop and hesitated. "Soda…Emma is dead."

"She's…what?" Sodapop asked in confusion, the words not sinking in. He didn't understand. Emma couldn't be dead.

"She died, Pepsi-Cola. James…he accidentally killed her."

Sodapop felt his mouth open slightly as he turned his gaze to the wall behind Darry. Emma was dead. The force of it hit him hard. A little innocent baby was dead. She would never grow up, never go to school, never have a boyfriend, never get to experience all the great things in life. She was dead. Sodapop would never see her again. She died before she had a chance to get rescued from that house. And it was all his fault.

"…they want you to testify too."

He picked up the end of what Darry had been saying, not realizing he was talking. Darry stopped and put a hand on his arm, looking at him in concern.

"Sodapop?"

Soda felt tears prickle his eyes and blinked hard. _Emma was dead._ He let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and pushed his chair back. He stood up slowly and walked in a daze. He should've told Darry earlier what happened. He should've told someone. He could have saved her. He could have stopped it from happening.

He let out a scream and blindly punched his hand into the wall in the hallway. He felt someone grab his shoulders and turn him around as they shouted "Sodapop!" The hands-Darry's hands-pushed him back into the wall to stop him from creating further damage. His legs buckled and he slid down to the floor, letting out a sob.

Darry dropped to his knees and pulled Sodapop forward into his arms, crushing him tight against his chest like he'd done with Ponyboy. Sodapop wrapped his arms around him and cried.

"It's ok," Darry said. "It's ok, little buddy."

"Dar?"

Darry heard a small hoarse voice from down the hall and looked up to see Ponyboy standing outside his door. "What happened?"

"Emma's dead," Darry said softly, rubbing Sodapop's back. Ponyboy's face flushed, making him look even whiter than he had before. Darry motioned him forward and once he was there, Ponyboy knelt down, joining in the group hug.

And that moment, that was the only thing Sodapop needed. His brothers.

XxX

It was a day when both Sodapop and Darry had to work that the next melt down happened. A few days after Sodapop had learned of Emma's death, and Ponyboy was home with Two-Bit and Steve. Sodapop had gotten better about it, but it was clear to everyone how upset he still was.

Ponyboy had been in the kitchen that day when he knocked over a mug that shattered across the floor. Two-Bit had come to see what had happened while Steve made some sarcastic remark from the living room. Ponyboy looked upset and Two-Bit tried to console him, but something inside him snapped.

He stormed to his room and kicked the door open. With tears running down his face, he took the first thing in site and threw it as hard as he could. Two-Bit let out a swear word as he and Steve came hurrying over to see what was going on. He told Steve to stay there and ran from the house.

Steve stood in the doorway and watched with raised eyebrows and wide eyes. For the first time, he didn't know what to do. Ponyboy grabbed a book and chucked it across the room, making it slam against the wall. He wiped at his face angrily, kicking his desk chair over. Steve heard two people running up the steps moments later and knew that Two-Bit had gone to get Soda. The front door flung open and Soda ran in, Two-Bit close behind.

Sodapop stopped next to Steve for a split second to see what Ponyboy was doing. Ponyboy had his comforter and ripped it off the bed, throwing it aside. He started to grab his sheets when Soda moved, sidestepping Steve.

"Pone!" Sodapop had assumed Ponyboy would've stopped the moment he approached, but he didn't. He tore at the sheets, growing frustrated that they wouldn't come off easily. Sodapop pushed them away from him, trying to make him stop.

"Ponyboy, stop," He urged gently. He could tell Ponyboy was in the midst of an emotional breakdown. Ponyboy, tears streaming from his eyes, turned around and grabbed the lamp off the bedside table. Sodapop caught him quickly, grabbing his hand to stop him from throwing it.

"Pony, stop! It's ok, it's ok!" At that moment, Two-Bit decided to step in. He ran forward and took the lamp from Ponyboy, setting it back down on the table. Ponyboy wrestled his hands away from Soda, moving to grab something else, but Two-Bit stopped him by holding down his arms.

"Pone, just relax!" Two-Bit struggled as he tried to keep hold of him. Soda grabbed him too and they forced him to sit down on his bed. Sodapop kneeled down in front of him while Two-Bit tried to keep a hold of him. Soda took Ponyboy's face in his hands, trying to calm him.

"It's ok, Ponyboy!" Ponyboy tried to break free. The tears poured down in large drops on his face. "It's gonna be ok, I promise. I promise you, Pony, it's gonna be ok! Just calm down."

Ponyboy stopped fighting and looked at him, his breathing coming out hard. Sodapop didn't move his hands away, but Two-Bit let go of his own grip, releasing Ponyboy. Absentmindedly, Sodapop wiped away one of Ponyboy's tears with his thumb, waiting for his little brother to do something.

It seemed like something inside Ponyboy snapped again and he looked down, his face flushing of color. Ponyboy was still sick and his skin felt feverish beneath Sodapop's fingers. The more Sodapop looked at him, the more he realized one of two things: First, Ponyboy was embarrassed about his melt down. That much was very clear to Sodapop, who knew the exact way Pony looked when he wanted to disappear. And the second thing that was clear to him, was the fact that Ponyboy was also about to puke. That too was very, very clear.

Sodapop let go of him and dived for the trash can, getting it to Ponyboy just in time for him to throw up. He put a hand on his back and cringed as Pony's body heaved with every motion of him emptying his stomach.

Sodapop looked over at Two-Bit with concerned eyes. "Two-Bit?"

"I'm on it," Two-Bit said seriously, all traces of humor gone. He pulled Steve out of the doorway and behind him as he left to go to the living room. Sodapop was glad he'd been able to read his mind. He knew it was best to have Darry come home, even if it meant him losing half a day's pay. Ponyboy was more uneasy when Darry wasn't around.

"Here, Pone," Sodapop said when he was done puking, extending his hand out to help his little brother up. "Come with me."

Ponyboy warily followed along to Sodapop's room, where Soda made him lay down and covered him up with blankets. He stayed with Ponyboy until the exhaustion from his meltdown, and throwing up, made him sleep. But before he fully lost consciousness, he'd grabbed Soda's wrist and whispered something to him. Sodapop hadn't been able to understand what he said.

Darry was home half an hour later. The sound of him and Sodapop talking woke Ponyboy up, but not enough to where he was coherent. Darry peaked inside the room to check on him and noticed his eyes open.

"Hey Pone," He said. "How ya feeling?"

He sat down on the edge of the bed and felt Ponyboy's forehead. Ponyboy was lying on his stomach and blinked his eyes a few times to get a better look at Darry.

"Darry," He said sleepily. "I broke a mug."

"I know, kiddo. It's ok."

"I think I hurt the…" He trailed off, sitting up slowly. Confusion made it's way over his face and then it turned to a look of horror. He flung his covers off him and was out the door so fast that Darry had barely noticed him move. When he did, he raced after Ponyboy to see what was wrong, finding him in his room shortly after. Darry hadn't seen what it looked like yet; Sodapop had told him Ponyboy messed it up during his meltdown.

Ponyboy was on his knees on the ground, cradling something to his chest. Darry came in and knelt beside him.

"Ponyboy?"

"I ruined the book," He whispered. Darry looked closely and noticed Ponyboy's copy of _Gone With The Wind _in his hands. He gently pried it away from him and looked at the damage. The cover was bent in half and a few of the pages bent as well, but it didn't look bad. Darry figured he must have thrown it during his rampage.

"It ain't broken, Pone. Just a little bent. It'll be ok."

Ponyboy rubbed his eyes and took the book. He muttered a "sorry" and carefully bent the cover back. His fingers moved delicately, as if the book could shatter at any moment. When he deemed it well enough, he stood slowly and set it back on his desk.

"Are you ok?" Darry asked. Ponyboy nodded and rubbed his eyes again.

"I thought I ruined it," He said softly. "I couldn't imagine…it was the last thing…."

Darry narrowed his eyes in concern, realizing how much alike Sodapop and Ponyboy really were. Thinking of his other little brother seemed to bring him into life and he was suddenly in the doorway, asking if Ponyboy was ok.

"I'm fine," Ponyboy said, clearly ashamed of his second outburst that day. Darry led him back to Sodapop's room and made him lay down. He told Ponyboy he'd bring him some medicine and food, but he appeared to already be falling back asleep before Darry even left the room.

"What was that?" Sodapop asked once Darry closed the door behind him.

"He thought he ruined that book Johnny gave him," Darry said, heading towards the bathroom. Sodapop followed behind him.

"He's getting really sick. Think we should take him to a doctor?" Sodapop wondered. Darry let out a sigh and opened the cupboard, pulling out the cold medicine.

"I'll take him in a few days. Doctor's office won't be open till Monday anyway and I can't take him tomorrow. We'll see if he starts getting better."

"You know, Darry," Soda said thoughtfully. "I ain't sure it's just a cold that is all that's making him sick."

"You know, Sodapop," Darry countered evenly, measuring the syrup into a spoon. "I think you're exactly right."


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry for the wait! Thanks for the all the reviews though! I went through yesterday reading them all. I can't believe how many I have!**

**Here's another thing I noticed in the movie: Darry tells Soda to hurry because he'll be late. Soda goes back towards Darry's room to get his jeans and then comes back without them and sits on the couch to watch TV.** **So Sodapop must not really be in any hurry, haha**

**Anyway, I kind of hate this chapter, but I hope you guys don't! Lemme know how you feel. **

**Enjoy.**

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Ponyboy woke up alone and confused. It was dark out, but the house was quieter than it normally was. Sodapop wasn't in bed beside him and his stomach felt like it was burning. He groaned and sat up slowly.

"Sodapop?" He asked in a hoarse voice. There was no response. He forced himself to get up and stumble his way into the hall, using the wall for support as he continued on. He knocked on Darry's closed door and waited a moment before he opened it.

"Darry?"

"Ponyboy?"

Instead of coming from inside the room, the voice came from behind him. He turned around to see Darry standing in the hall, drying his hands on a dish towel. It took Ponyboy a moment to comprehend the difference, but by then Darry was already to him, putting a hand on his forehead.

"What's a matter?"

Ponyboy rubbed his eyes as he spoke. "I don't feel good."

"I know, kiddo. You should get back in bed."

This time Ponyboy's voice came out as a whine. "No, Darry. I _really_ don't feel good."

Darry looked at him in concern. "What is it?"

"My stomach." Ponyboy swallowed hard to keep himself from throwing up. "It hurts real bad."

"Do you feel like you're gonna puke?"

Ponyboy nodded. "It burns."

"Ok, can you make it to the bathroom?" Darry asked. Ponyboy nodded again. "Go to the bathroom and I'll be right there."

Ponyboy did as he was told and sat down on the closed toilet seat, wrapping his arms around his stomach. Darry entered in a moment later with a bottle in his hand.

"What's that?" Ponyboy asked, wiping away beads of sweat on his forehead.

"Something to make you puke." Darry was carefully measuring the liquid into the cap as he spoke. Ponyboy gave him a confused look.

"Huh?"

Darry set the bottle down in the sink and handed him the lid. "When I was younger, I dared Sodapop to drink this really gross stuff I made. Mom had to take him to the hospital cause it made him really sick. They gave him this to make him puke."

Ponyboy took it, but looked at it wearily. "Dar…I don't wanna puke…"

"It'll make you feel better, Pone. If not, I'll take you to the doc, ok?"

Ponyboy cringed and nodded, downing the stuff fast. It didn't take long to work. Shortly after, he was on his knees in front of the toilet, heavily heaving everything in his stomach up. Darry sat on the edge of the tub and rubbed his back every few moments. Someone came into the house and to the doorway of the bathroom, but Ponyboy didn't see who it was. Darry told them where Sodapop was and told the person to go hang out with him for a little while he took care of Ponyboy. Ponyboy guessed the person left because they weren't there when he finished puking fifteen minutes later.

He was exhausted, and sleepily told Darry to let him rest on the bathroom floor. Darry tried to convince him his bed or even the couch would be nicer, but Ponyboy didn't wanna move. Finally Darry brought him in a pillow and blanket and let him sleep.

He awoke next on the couch, hearing the sounds of Sodapop and Darry talking in the kitchen. He was lying on his stomach with his arm dangling down to the floor, too tired and achy to move. Darry walked into the living room and said something to him, but Ponyboy just looked tiredly at him before his eyes closed again.

"Sodapop, stop," A voice whispered harshly. It was the next thing that pulled Ponyboy from unconsciousness.

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

"Jeeze, Dar," Sodapop muttered. "I ain't even doing nothing."

Ponyboy moaned in annoyance, trying to tune them out. He felt someone gently brush some of his hair aside from his forehead.

"See? You're bugging him."

"You guys are both bugging me," Ponyboy mumbled.

"C'mon, Sodapop," Darry said. "Let him sleep."

"But I just…I thought I should…"

"No, Sodapop," Darry said quietly, gently. "You knew how it would work. You agreed."

Sodapop sighed. "I know…I know."

Had Ponyboy been more conscious, he would been confused by what was going on. He felt Sodapop kiss him gently on the forehead before he whispered, "Love you, kiddo" and then it was quiet again. Ponyboy fell back asleep, unaware of what was going on around him.

XxX

"You ready?" Darry asked, closing the truck door and putting the key in the ignition. Sodapop looked back at the house nervously, but nodded. Darry patted his leg and started the car.

"It won't be that bad."

"Sure," Sodapop muttered, biting his fingernail. The rest of the ride was silent. Darry didn't know what to say to make Sodapop feel better. He was trying to make himself feel better about it first. He didn't want Sodapop away from him again, but Soda needed help. And Darry promised him.

It didn't take long to get there, much to both of their dismay. After Darry had pulled in and parked, they sat in the car for a few minutes, not moving. Finally Sodapop let out a sigh and opened his door. Darry followed after. They got his bag from the back and Darry walked him up to the door.

"You ain't coming in?" Sodapop asked. Darry shook his head.

"The lady told me not to. Said to just drop you off."

"Oh," Sodapop looked down and shuffled his feet. "Well…"

Darry pulled him into a bear hug and held him tight. Sodapop dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around him, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

"I love you, Dar," He whispered. Darry ruffled his hair and pushed him back, nodding.

"I love you, too, little buddy." He leaned down and grabbed the bag, handing it to Soda. "Now go get better and come back, ok?"

Sodapop smiled. "Ok, Dar."

XxX

"Sodapop, right?" Soda nodded, biting his thumb nail. "I'm Kasey."

Kasey sat down on the chair across from the couch Sodapop was on. Sodapop's leg bounced anxiously and he glanced around the fancy room. He'd never been in any place like this before. It made him nervous.

"That's a real unique name you got there," Kasey said. Sodapop nodded again.

"I've got a brother named Ponyboy, too."

Kasey smiled and looked at the clipboard in her hands. "I saw that. Is that his real name?"

Sodapop smiled, too. "Yeah. My dad was a real unique kind of person."

"It certainly appears so. Are you anything like him?" Kasey asked. Sodapop shrugged and wrung his hands together.

"I guess a little bit."

"You're nervous," Kasey observed. "Relax, Sodapop. There's nothing to be worried about."

"I ain't worried," Sodapop tried to defend himself, but he started to bite his nail again, diminishing his words.

"Do you bite your nails often?"

Sodapop immediately dropped his hand and gave her a sheepish smile. "Sorry."

"That's quite all right," She said. Sodapop watched her write something on the clipboard. She looked friendly, which helped ease his tension a little. She was older, maybe around the age Soda's mom was when she passed away.

"Do you have kids?" Sodapop asked suddenly. Kasey looked at him, her face calm.

"Yes, I do. I have a daughter and a grandson."

Sodapop sank down in the couch, putting his hands on his legs. He wasn't sure why he asked.

Kasey spoke again though, setting her clipboard down. "Do you wanna talk about her, Sodapop?"

"About who?" Soda asked.

"Emma," Kasey said. "The little girl from the house you stayed at."

Sodapop opened his mouth, but no words came out. He stumbled for a few seconds before he could make a coherent thought. "I…yes. I think I should."

"'Should' and 'want' aren't the same thing," Kasey said sympathetically. "If you don't wanna talk about it, then we'll talk about something else. I'm not forcing you to."

Sodapop nodded. "Ok…ok, then maybe…we should start with something else."

"Ok," Kasey agreed. "Tell me about your older brother, Darrel. He seems like a nice boy. What did he do to get you and Ponyboy taken away from him?"

Sodapop sighed and ran his hands over his face. "That…is an awfully long story."

XxXx

"Hey, Pone," Darry said as he came into the house. He let the door close behind him and slid off his coat, hanging it on the coat rack. "How're you feeling?"

"Better," Ponyboy said from the couch. He turned his attention away from the TV to glance over at Darry for a second. Darry couldn't tell if he was lying or not. Though Ponyboy was sitting up and actually talking, his face was still pale and his checks were rosy. Darry walked over and felt his forehead. He was still hot, but not as hot as he had been.

"Feel up to eating anything?"

"Sure," Ponyboy said, seeming distracted as he watched some show that Darry had never seen before. Darry smiled in amusement and left for the kitchen. They were running low on food and Darry knew he needed to head to the store soon. He salvaged what he could and made something decent, being careful to make sure he didn't use something that would upset Ponyboy's stomach.

When he was done, he set up the table and called for Ponyboy. He brought in the food from the kitchen and then sat down with his youngest brother. He started into his meal quickly, hoping Ponyboy wouldn't ask where Sodapop was. But he did.

"Where's Soda?"

Darry let out a heavy sigh and set his fork down. "Sodapop is…well, he's gonna be away for a little while."

"Huh?"

"The lady from the state that comes to check on us…well, me and her decided to get some…_care_…for Sodapop. So he's staying at a place where they are gonna make him better," Darry tried to explain. Ponyboy was quiet for a few moments, mulling something over in his mind.

"How long?"

"Two weeks," Darry said. He watched Ponyboy carefully, waiting for some kind of outburst or emotional breakdown. It didn't happen, though.

"OK," Ponyboy said simply, taking a bite of his food.

"OK?" Darry asked in confusion. Ponyboy nodded, his mouth full as he spoke.

"Yup."

Darry sat back in his chair and looked at him quizzically. That hadn't been the response he was expecting. There was nothing; no crying, no disappointment, no outrage. It was what made Darry finally confirm in his head that something must be wrong with his little brother.


	11. Chapter 11

**I. am. so. sorry!**

**I won't waste your time telling you what went on, haha. Thanks so much for the continued support!**

**Enjoy!.**

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Three days. Four thousand three hundred and twenty minutes. Two hundred fifty-nine thousand and two hundred seconds. That's how long Sodapop had been gone before it really started to affect Darry. He burnt dinner. He knocked things over. He lost his keys, misplaced his work belt; all the things he wasn't prone to doing. And he kept Ponyboy close, never wanting him to be out of the house and out of his view.

Ponyboy didn't seem to mind. It was clear his clinginess to Darry hadn't diminished within the time that he had been home. He didn't like going out anyway. He was more into reading and drawing. He would never show Darry, or anyone for that matter, what he was sketching. They didn't pry.

He wasn't sleeping at night and it took Two-Bit's realization to make Darry see it as well. The lack of sleep was making Ponyboy more sick when he should have been getting better. Two-Bit hung around the house when Darry was at work and he watched Ponyboy fall asleep countless times right in the middle of doing something. Two-Bit forced him one day to go into his room and get some sleep, but when he woke up screaming later, he didn't let Two-Bit force him again. The nightmare had scared Two-Bit so bad that he didn't even try.

Darry could hear him at night sometimes, wandering through the house. He wondered if Ponyboy couldn't sleep without Sodapop. Soda's presence usually helped to ease his nightmares and without him, Darry figured Ponyboy wasn't willing to face his terrors alone. He offered to have Ponyboy come sleep with him, but as assumed, Ponyboy declined and said he was fine. Darry didn't want to argue with him. He wasn't sure just exactly how stable his little brother was.

As expected after being in close proximity of someone who is sick, Darry caught whatever bug his little brother had. He couldn't afford to miss work though, and had to continue through it. He was miserable, whether he wanted to admit it or not. Two-Bit and Steve could see it clearly.

To help out, they came over before Darry got home and cooked dinner. Ponyboy helped, too, as much as Two-Bit would let him. He was still sick and couldn't stand very long in the kitchen when it started to get hot. Steve protested him touching anything that he and Two-Bit would be putting in their mouths. It was already too late for Darry, he argued.

Ponyboy made faces at him when he wasn't looking, which in turn made Two-Bit laugh. When Steve had disappeared from the kitchen for a second, Ponyboy grabbed the plate Steve had set out for himself and obnoxiously touched all the food on it.

"He's gonna kill you," Two-Bit laughed as they brought the plates out to the table. Ponyboy shrugged, giving him a smile. Steve had a strong immune system. Ponyboy knew if he hadn't gotten sick yet, he probably wasn't going to.

"That's terrible logic," Two-Bit argued. "I ain't sick and I've been around you more than Steve."

Ponyboy wiped the back of his hand under his nose. "Yeah, but this ain't the first time I've touched something Steve put in his mouth."

Two-Bit burst into a fight of laughter. "I think I love you."

"Ew."

When Darry got home, he couldn't quite figure out why Two-Bit kept chuckling and shooting Ponyboy occasional glances while they ate. He could see Ponyboy biting back a smile, trying to kept himself from laughing. Steve seemed just as confused and couldn't take anymore of it, demanding to know what was going on. Still, Ponyboy didn't say anything. Two-Bit covered his mouth with his hand and shook his head.

Darry was just a little too grumpy to really appreciate the fact that Ponyboy was having fun. He shrugged when Steve gave him a look. He didn't feel good. He rubbed his temples and closed his eyes for a few minutes, listening to Steve and Two-Bit banter about what was going on.

It wasn't until he heard a loud thump that he opened his eyes again. At the same time the thump was happening, Two-Bit was crying out "Ponyboy!" It took only a second for Darry to realize that Ponyboy was no longer at the table. He was lying sprawled on the floor.

Darry swore quickly and pushed himself from his chair, dropping to the floor beside his unconscious brother. Two-Bit ran around the table and kneeled on the other side of Ponyboy while Steve pushed himself on the table and jumped over.

"Pone," Darry said, putting a hand on his forehead. "Can you hear me?"

Darry could hear Two-Bit mumbling something under his breath, sounding distressed. Suddenly Ponyboy opened his eyes. Darry let out a relieved sigh.

"Ponyboy, are you ok?" He asked carefully.

Ponyboy blinked a few times. "What happened?"

"You passed out," Two-Bit cut in, his voice serious and full of concern. "Damn it, Ponyboy. I told you this would happen."

"Whoa, excuse me?" Darry asked. "Told him what would happen? And why didn't anyone tell me?"

"I did tell you. He hasn't been sleeping."

"Oh," Darry seemed caught off guard. "Right."

"Should we take him to the hospital?" Steve questioned, interrupting them. Ponyboy pushed himself into a sitting position.

"I'm fine," He said. Darry looked at him for a long moment.

"Ponyboy, I won't take you to the hospital as long as you go lay on the couch and actually get some sleep, got it?"

"But…Darry…" He started.

"No," Darry cut him off. "Don't even start with me. You just passed out from lack of sleep. Now go get on the couch or I'm forcibly putting you in the car and making you spend the night in a hospital room."

Ponyboy closed his mouth. He looked at the ground, his cheeks slightly reddening. He nodded, though, and let Darry help him to his feet.

Once Darry had him laying down on the couch with a pillow and covered in a blanket, he went back to the dining room to put away the dishes. He was surprised to find that they were already gone. Steve and Two-Bit must have gotten them.

He sat down at the table and buried his face into his hands. How could he have let Ponyboy get so bad about not sleeping? He should've paid more attention. He knew Ponyboy was having a hard time with it. Sodapop not being here was no excuse for him not sleeping. He just wasn't sure what to do to help his little brother.

XxXxX

"What?" Sodapop cried.

"He's fine, Sodapop. He just hasn't been sleeping."

"Well why not?" Sodapop ran a hand over his face, pulling the phone cord over so he could sit down on a chair. Darry sighed.

"I dunno. I know Two-Bit told me he had a nasty nightmare."

Sodapop cringed. "Like the ones when I was there?"

"I guess. I'm not sure. I mean, he's just been acting really weird. I told him you were gone and you know what he said? He said OK. He's not taking this as hard as he should be. Maybe him not sleeping is part of him missing you."

"Or, you know, maybe he really is fine with it?" Sodapop suggested, but he knew it wasn't true. "If he's not sleeping, maybe I should come back."

"Nice try, Sodapop. You know it doesn't work that way. How's it going there?"

"It's fine," Sodapop sighed. "It just ain't home."

"I know, little buddy. But they're making you better."

"I know, I know. Oh, I gotta go, Dar. I have a meeting. Tell Ponyboy I love him, ok? And tell him if he doesn't get sleep, I'm not coming home."

"Soda!"

"Just kidding, Dar. I love you."

"Love you, too, little buddy. See ya."

XxX

"How are you today, Sodapop?"

"I'm all right."

"Just all right?" Kasey asked.

"Well, I got a call from my brother today," Sodapop confessed.

"Is everything all right?"

"Yeah. Ponyboy passed out. I guess he hasn't been sleeping." Sodapop brought his fingers to his mouth, biting on one of his nails. Kasey smiled, but continued on.

"Why hasn't he been sleeping?"

"I dunno. Darry said he had a pretty bad nightmare."

Kasey looked at her clipboard. "The kind he had when your parents died?"

Sodapop nodded.

"Soda, from what you've told me about Ponyboy's behavior since he came back from the house he was staying at, aren't you at all concerned that something happened to him?"

"Of course I am," Sodapop said desperately. "But he won't tell me anything!"

"Did Darry consider taking him here for help, too?"

Sodapop shook his head. "Ponyboy keeps denying anything is wrong. He wouldn't be willing to come here."

"Hmmm," Kasey tapped her pencil against her nose, looking thoughtful. "You said Ponyboy kept running into stuff and acting really weird after Johnny and Dallas died, right?"

"Yeah."

"Did he do anything like that when he first came home from that house?"

Sodapop racked his brain for a few moments. "Well, he was more quiet than normal. He did a lot of weird stuff though."

"Like what?"

"He just stood in the hallway looking at the hole that Darry punched in the wall. Then he was standing at the window at like five in the morning."

"What else?"

"Well, he suddenly is afraid of the dark. He won't go in the backyard. Oh, and he had this really weird meltdown where he started tearing our room apart. He was throwing stuff and kicking things over."

"Interesting. And you said he's been sick, right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

Kasey set her clipboard down on the table and looked at him. "From what you've told me, it appears that Ponyboy goes through a certain pattern after a traumatizing event. He got the nightmares after your parents died, he started acting weird when his friends died, and now he's having both. I think something traumatizing happened to Ponyboy while he was away."

Sodapop pushed the palm of his hands into his eyes. "What do I do?"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that one, Sodapop. Ponyboy can't get help unless he can admit he needs it. You might want to talk to Darry about this."

XxXxX

Darry set his paper down on the coffee table and looked at Ponyboy. He was sound asleep, thankfully. It had only taken a few minutes of the sounds from the TV playing for him to drift off.

Two-Bit and Steve went home so Darry could get some rest as well. Darry was really thankful for everything they were doing to help out. He was feeling overwhelmed with all that was going on. Not having Sodapop around made things more hard. He didn't realize how much he needed Sodapop. And now that he had done his job in getting one brother help, he needed to figure out what to do about the other one.

Ponyboy was worse to deal with. At least Sodapop knew he needed to help himself. Ponyboy was stubborn, hard headed, and irrational. He couldn't even admit that something was bothering him.

Darry could honestly say for once in his life he had absolutely no idea what to do.


	12. Chapter 12

__**All right, a lot of dialogue in this one. I'm sorry that the dialogue has been rather inconstant with the time period the boys are in. I hope it won't bother you while you're reading. Last chapter all of it was pretty stiff.  
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**Also, for the person who said it seems like I don't know what's wrong with Ponyboy and I'm making it up as I go (since you weren't signed in, haha), I just wanted to say that Ponyboy's situation has actually been the one steady thing I've had through this story. I had his event down before I even finished writing the first chapter. I do understand why it seems like it's just going in crazy directions, but don't worry, it'll come together. I just wanted the reader to feel like they have no idea what's going on with him because that's how he feels. If that makes sense? I dunno. But have no fear!**

**Anyways, to follow up a really bad chapter, here's a slightly less bad chapter! :) And...well...it's me...so if you've read my stories before, then you probably guessed this was going to happen (in reference to Ponyboy. You'll understand, haha. I promise. It has a point this time). **

**Thanks for the reviews! As always, definitely appreciated!  
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**Enjoy!**

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_Sodapop buried his face into his hands, sitting at the top of the staircase. James was coming back to punish him. He'd made a deal: He wouldn't struggle or fight against him, and in return James wouldn't cause any harm to Emma. If he did fight, James promised he would make Emma face the consequences of it. Sodapop would never do anything to hurt her. He loved her like a little sister. But sitting still to let someone burn you wasn't an easy task. He heard James come out from his bedroom and felt a hand on his shoulder. _

Sodapop gasped and shot up in bed, breathing hard. When he realized where he was, he let out a deep breath, running a hand back through his hair. He glanced at the clock. Today was the day of the trial. They wanted Sodapop to testify in the murder of Emma. He knew it was going to be one of the hardest things he'd ever have to do. Luckily Darry was going to be there.

Knowing he couldn't get back to sleep, Sodapop spent the next few hours wasting time. He took a shower and slowly got dressed in his best clothes, examining himself in the mirror. He looked different, more serious. He didn't like it. The Sodapop he knew was never serious. Then again, he'd felt so far away from himself for a while. He was hoping this place would fix it.

"Sodapop?" He heard someone knock on the door. He looked at the doorway where the person was standing.

"Yeah?"

"It's time to go."

He nodded and grabbed his coat off the bed before following the person out. He was quiet on the ride there. His mind was swirling. He didn't want to do this, but he knew he had to. Not because he was forced to, but because he wanted justice for Emma. He wanted James locked away for a long time.

The car came to a stop at the courthouse and Sodapop stepped out, feeling the breeze outside pick up. It looked like they were going to be hit with another summer storm. He hoped, for Ponyboy's sake, that they weren't. For some reason, Ponyboy had become terrified of storms.

Sodapop looked up and saw Darry waiting outside the doors. All of his previous worries vanished and he took off at a run.

"Soda," Darry smiled, pulling him into a crushing hug when he got there. Sodapop held him tight.

"I missed you," He whispered. Darry buried his face into Soda's hair.

"Miss you too, little buddy," He said. He pulled away and held Sodapop at arms length, examining his face. "You ready?"

Sodapop nodded and gave him a smile. He was ready for anything as long as Darry was there.

XxXxX

"Hey, Pone," Two-Bit said, sitting down on the couch beside Ponyboy. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Ponyboy shrugged, closing the book he was reading. He looked over at Two-Bit. "What's up?"

Two-Bit hesitated for a moment before letting out a sigh. "Did…did something awful happen to you?"

Ponyboy gave him a confused look. "Huh?"

"At that house you stayed in. You've been acting real…different."

Ponyboy looked at his book for a long moment, not speaking. Two-Bit watched him nervously. Maybe he shouldn't have asked. Ponyboy was appearing to get better, despite his new habit of not sleeping enough. The question had been tearing at Two-Bit for a long time though.

"I…" Ponyboy let out a breath, stopping for another few moments. Two-Bit wasn't sure he was even going to start speaking again until finally he did. "It doesn't matter anymore. I just…I wanna let it go."

Two-Bit nodded. "OK, Pone. But…you might wanna think about talking to someone or something. Just…to help you feel better."

"Sure, Two-Bit," Ponyboy said, flipping the book back open and continuing in the place he left off. Two-Bit blew a breath out between his lips and ran a hand back through his hair.

XxXxX

"All right, and besides the burns what else happened?"

Sodapop swallowed hard. "I…"

"Your honor," A lawyer interrupted "Don't we already have enough to testify him? Do we really need to put this young man through the torture of reliving it all?"

"No, you're correct," The judge said. "Sodapop, you don't need to answer anything else. Why don't you and Darrel go walk around for a little bit and I'll have someone come get you when we need you back, OK?"

Sodapop nodded, feeling relieved. "Thank you."

He hopped down from the stand and met Darry at the back of the room. Darry put a hand on his shoulder and lead him outside into the hall. The moment the doors closed behind them, Darry pulled Sodapop into a hug. Sodapop, taken off guard, jumped, but then relaxed.

"I'm so sorry, Sodapop," Darry said.

"For what, Dar?" Sodapop asked.

"For getting you sent away. For letting those bad things happen to you."

Sodapop pushed him back. "What're you talking about? You didn't let those things happen. They just did."

"But they wouldn't have if I hadn't gotten you taken away," Darry protested.

"Darry," Sodapop sighed. "You didn't know they'd send me there. You couldn't have guessed it. It ain't your fault. _Please_ don't think it is."

Darry sighed, too. "It ain't that easy, Sodapop, but…I'll try."

XxXxX

"Looks like we're getting a storm," Two-Bit said. Ponyboy glanced up from his book to look out the window.

"Yeah," He said quietly.

"Member when we used to go outside and dance in the rain?" Two-Bit asked, nudging him. Ponyboy smiled.

"Yeah. My mom would get so mad."

"But your dad came and danced with us," Two-Bit laughed. Ponyboy looked out the window again. Two-Bit watched him for a moment before speaking. "Do you wanna do it again?"

Ponyboy shook his head. "Rain is different now."

"What do you mean?"

"It's not fun like it used to be." Ponyboy shut his book and tossed it on the coffee table. "It's just annoying."

Two-Bit gave him a sad look. "I'm sure your dad wouldn't feel that way."

"Yeah, well my dad is in the ground," Ponyboy retorted. "Right where I belong, too."

Two-Bit's mouth dropped open. "Ponyboy."

"Don't." Ponyboy stood up and ran a hand over his face. "I'm sorry. I just…" He stopped and looked around. In the distance, thunder boomed and echoed out towards them. Two-Bit saw Ponyboy go tense. He stood to question him, but the motion made Ponyboy back away like a scared animal. Two-Bit froze, but it was too late. He'd startled the frightened puppy inside of Ponyboy, which set him off in a chain of events. Before Two-Bit could comprehend it, Ponyboy was walking out the door.

"Ponyboy, wait!" Two-Bit called as the door started to close, trying to get his shoes on. "You shouldn't be going out! You're still sick! At least let me come with you."

He opened the door and stepped out onto the porch, pushing his shoe into place. He looked around as the wind picked up leaves and blew them by. Ponyboy was nowhere in site.

XxXxX

"So how's Ponyboy?" Sodapop asked, trying to change the conversation. They sat down on a bench against the wall.

"He's better now that he got sleep."

"What about the nightmares?"

Darry shook his head. "I dunno. I haven't heard him screaming or anything, so that's good."

"Maybe he's getting better," Sodapop shrugged.

"Maybe. What about you? How're you feeling?"

Sodapop thought about the question for a moment. A man in a suit came walking down the hall and both brothers watched him go by silently. Sodapop stared after him. "I think I'm feeling better."

"You think?" Darry asked.

Sodapop nodded. "I'm gonna feel a whole lot better once James is in the cooler."

"Me too," Darry said. "You know he's here, right?"

"Yeah," Sodapop said softly. "I know."

"You probably won't have to see him, though," Darry said. "I talked to someone earlier about it."

Sodapop smiled and looked over at Darry. "Thanks, Dar."

"No problem, little buddy," Darry said as he threw an arm around Soda and pulled him close. The doors to the room they were in before opened and someone stepped out.

"Ready to come back in?" The person asked. Sodapop nodded.

"Ready as I'll ever be."

XxXxX

"I gotta call Darry."

"Don't be stupid," Steve said.

"Well he's gotta know," Two-Bit protested, heading towards the phone. Steve jumped in the way and pushed him back.

"You can't call Darry at a _courthouse _and tell him you can't find his little brother."

"Why not?" Two-Bit asked. "I have the number."

Steve groaned in annoyance. "How do you think that's gonna look to the state, genius?"

Two-Bit sighed and buried his face in his hands. "What do we do?"

"Did you look _everywhere_?" Steve asked. "Even the graveyard?"

"Even the graveyard," Two-Bit said. "He's nowhere."

"He's somewhere," Steve corrected. "He just doesn't wanna be found."

"Yeah, well that's real fine and dandy for him," Two-Bit said sarcastically.

"You stay here and wait for Darry to come back. I'm gonna go out looking again." Steve headed towards the door, but turned back before he opened it. "Stay away from the phone. Darry will be home soon anyway. Let's just hope Ponyboy comes back before then."

"Yeah, you apparently don't know Ponyboy like I do," Two-Bit muttered as Steve went out the door.


	13. Chapter 13

**Wanted to get this chapter out now cause some stuff is going on. **

**I also need to give you a little PSA right now. The following event you may have seen in a movie (which is why it could sound familiar), but it's also based off of true events. Not everyone is as lucky as Ponyboy and the kid this really happened to. Not everyone comes out alive. If you, or someone you know, is being abused, get help! Don't assume someone else will do it just cause you don't. One moment can change someone's entire life and you could be the person to save them before it's too late. Don't ever think it's OK for someone to hit you or verbally abuse you. It's not! Tell an adult, a friend, a counselor, and if they don't listen, tell someone else! Someone is always there to help you! **

**Thank you for the reviews. Let's see if any of you guessed right!  
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"Ponyboy!"

"Pone! Where are you?"

The rain poured down on them, making it hard to see even with their flashlights. Drops of water were dripping from their soaking wet hair onto their faces. Darry squinted and looked around again. When he had gotten home earlier, Two-Bit had rambled on and on about how sorry he was for not going after Ponyboy. Darry was confused until Two-Bit explained that Ponyboy had run off and no one could find him. Instantly, Darry was at the phone, calling around. Steve came back not long after with no news.

"He doesn't wanna be found," He'd said again. Outside the rain began to fall as the sun starting going down. Darry was scared. He'd seen how Ponyboy acted the last time they had a storm. Now he was out in it somewhere, with no one to comfort him.

When it was completely dark out, Darry, Two-Bit, and Steve all took off on foot in the rain to find him. They split up after searching together for a few minutes and made a deal to meet back together at the house twenty minutes later. From there, they would take Darry's truck and go looking if they had to.

That never happened. After twenty minutes, Darry started to make his way home. But as he wandered through the dark streets, shining his flashlight in every direction and calling Ponyboy's name, he stumbled across someone in the lot who hadn't been there before. He shined the light forward. A small figure was back in the corner, digging through the soft wet soil with a shovel. Darry recognized him almost instantly.

He ran forward, but stopped a few feet away from Ponyboy, a little terrified of startling him.

"Ponyboy!" He yelled over the rain. "What're you doing out here?"

Ponyboy didn't stop. He stuck the shovel in the ground again and threw the dirt to the side of him. Darry cautiously walked forward. He could see Ponyboy shaking. Suddenly Pony tossed the shovel aside and dropped to his knees, digging into the ground with his hands. This time Darry moved and dropped to his knees beside him.

"Ponyboy, what're you doing?" He asked. He could see now that Ponyboy was crying, even through the rain. His breathing was erratic and his fingernails were bloody and raw.

"Pone," Darry said desperately, grabbing his hands to make him stop.

"I-I…I didn't m-m-mean to," He stuttered through his tears, nearly sobbing.

"Didn't mean to what?" Darry asked. Ponyboy shook his head and pulled his hands back, continuing to claw through the dirt.

"H-he said h-he would d-d-do it cause I-I was bad." He choked back a sob and stopped for a moment to close his eyes. Darry could feel himself breathing hard as he watched Ponyboy in concern. Ponyboy opened his eyes and continued on.

"H-he th-threatened m-me with it w-when I did s-something he d-didn't like."

"What'd he do?" Darry asked, his voice just above a whisper. He was scared to know. "What'd he do, Pone?"

"H-he'd get the shovel." Ponyboy clawed more desperately through the soil. "You-you knew the c-consequences." He let out a sob. "Y-you knew."

Darry didn't take his gaze away. "What'd he do with the shovel, Ponyboy?"

"He'd m-make m-me dig." Darry could tell Ponyboy was far back in a flashback, his eyes stormy with the memories. "D-dig d-damn it. Dig."

He sucked in a large breath, but didn't stop digging. Darry could barely breathe.

"Then what, Pone?" He asked gently, nearly choking on his words.

"I-in," Ponyboy said shakily. He was scooping out dirt with his hands, the hole filling with more and more water. He didn't seem to notice, though. "H-how f-far will I go b-before y-you get it? A-actions have c-consequences, P-Ponyboy. And you w-were b-bad."

Darry's eyes were wide. He couldn't move. He was terrified.

"What-" His voice broke. "What was he doing…once you were in?"

Ponyboy let out a sob that was mixed with a whine and he started pushing the dirt back in. Darry's eyes filled with tears.

"He started filling the hole in," He whispered as more of a statement than a question. Ponyboy broke out in full blown sobs and nodded.

Every piece of Darry's heart shattered right then and there. To this day, he can still remember the empty hollow pain that threatened to suffocate him. It was worse than when his mom and dad died. It was worse than anything he'd ever felt before. It knocked the wind out of him and left him in a daze for a few seconds until the sound of Ponyboy crying came back into his mind.

Darry reached out towards him. The motion caught Ponyboy's eye and before Darry's hand could touch him, Ponyboy had flung his arms around Darry in a tight grip. Darry held him close, crushing him against his chest.

"D-Darry," Ponyboy sobbed, letting out a wail.

"Shh, it's ok," Darry said with a shaky voice. "It's ok. You're ok. I'm here, Pone. It's all gonna be ok."

He could feel Ponyboy's fingers digging weakly into his back as his own fingers tightened into a fist, digging into his palms as he fought the overwhelming feeling taking over him. Still, he kept repeating the same words over and over to Ponyboy.

Lightning lit up the sky around them and made Darry suddenly aware of how wet they were. Through his drenched shirt he could feel his heart pounding against his chest as his little brother sobbed relentlessly in his arms. He needed to take Ponyboy away from here.

He scooped him up into his arms, catching Ponyboy by surprise. Darry heard him gasp. Ponyboy kept his arms around him and turned his face into Darry's shoulder.

Darry moved quickly through the rain. He sprinted up the steps to the house and hurried through the door, leaving it open behind him. Two-Bit and Steve, who had been waiting at the house, swarmed him, asking him what happened. He brushed off their questions and took Ponyboy back to his room. He set him down on the bed and told him to take off his wet shirt. While he did, Darry headed towards the closet in the hallway, pulling his own shirt off. Two-Bit and Steve followed him back to Ponyboy's room after he grabbed a couple blankets. He wrapped one around Ponyboy, who was still crying, and sat down next to him on the bed, pulling him close.

"Darry," Two-Bit said quietly. "His fingers are bleeding."

Darry grabbed Ponyboy's hands and looked at them. He let out a swear word.

"I got it," Steve said, hurrying from the room. Two-Bit kneeled in front of Ponyboy and looked up at Darry.

"What happened, Darry?" He asked softly.

Darry swallowed back his own tears and pulled Ponyboy close again, resting his cheek on the top of Ponyboy's head.

"They buried him, Two-Bit. They buried him," He whispered. Two-Bit's face drained of all color.

"The…the people at that house?" He asked fearfully. Darry nodded as Steve came back in with the first aid kit.

"Here," He said, handing it to Darry. Darry let go of Ponyboy and took it gratefully. As he opened the kit and began to clean Ponyboy's fingers up, Steve asked what happened. Not receiving an answer, Steve looked at Two-Bit, who appeared as though he was going to throw up.

"Two-Bit?"

Two-Bit swallowed hard and stood up. "C'mere," He said and led Steve out into the hall to tell him what happened.

Steve was horrified. Neither of the boys went back into the room until Darry came out. They knew they needed to step back and let him take over. He was the one Ponyboy needed, not them. So they waited until Darry emerged in new dry clothes before the topic was brought up again.

"I got him to explain a little more," Darry said tiredly as they sat around in the living room.

"What more is there?" Steve asked.

Darry shook his head. "Just specifics."

"Well, go on."

Darry looked at Two-Bit. "Are you OK to hear this? You look sick."

Two-Bit nodded, though, and Darry continued on. "The boyfriend's name is Robert. Ponyboy said he has a drinking problem. I guess he would insult Ponyboy a lot and push him around. One night it got real bad and he got fed up with Ponyboy, so he made him go in the backyard and dig a hole. Then he made Ponyboy lay down in it and…and he…"

"He buried him in there?" Steve asked, his teeth clenched.

Darry nodded. "Ponyboy said Robert gave him a straw to breathe through so he wouldn't suffocate, but it was still real hard to breathe."

"How'd he get out?" Steve asked breathlessly.

"Jacob dug him out."

"How long was he in there?" Two-Bit chimed in suddenly with a quiet voice.

"I dunno," Darry sighed. "He ain't sure. But the second time he was only in there for a couple minutes."

Steve made a low sound in the back of his throat. "There were _two_ times?"

Darry nodded again and ran a hand back through his hair. "The second time he passed out. Jacob had to give him CPR."

Two-Bit let out a long moan. "I'm gonna throw up."

"You ain't gonna throw up. Relax," Steve said before turning back to Darry. "The kid seemed fine when he came home, though. Doesn't CPR mean someone is like practically dead?"

"No," Darry said. "Means he needed oxygen and couldn't get none. The people who're practically dead have gone too long without it. He only went a minute or so. Jacob took him to the doctor to make sure he was OK, though. Two-Bit, are you all right?"

Steve looked over as Two-Bit shook his head wearily. "Are you?"

Darry let out a deep sigh and shook his head, too. He was infuriated. He was devastated. He was broken. Everything made sense to him now. Ponyboy was afraid of storms because Robert had buried him on a night they were having a thunder storm. Ponyboy wouldn't go in the backyard. Ponyboy was afraid of the dark. Ponyboy was having terrible nightmares.

Ponyboy… had been buried alive.


	14. Chapter 14

**Finally! I'm sorry for the wait. This chapter was written, re-written, erased, and then written again so many times that I wasn't sure a solid version was ever going to come out. This ended up being the one that worked.**

**Thanks for the crazy amount of reviews! Sorry if I didn't get back to you! I'm not ignoring you :) I really appreciate it.  
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**Hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. Sorry if it does!  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p>Darry didn't sleep that night. Neither did Steve or Two-Bit. They sat around the living room, talking and taking everything in. It wasn't until Ponyboy awoke in tears sometime later that Darry finally moved from his spot on the recliner. Two-Bit and Steve could hear him talking to his little brother, but it seemed like Darry just didn't know what to do to calm Ponyboy. Ponyboy didn't want to be comforted. And Darry….well, Darry had forgotten.<p>

You see, he forgot that Ponyboy still saw a pediatrician. He forgot that Ponyboy was years younger than the rest of the gang. He forgot that Ponyboy was fragile and sensitive. He forgot that Ponyboy was a child.

And sometimes a child needs to be treated differently.

Now that Ponyboy's secret had been exposed, he didn't have to hide his emotions anymore. Some kind of damn had been broken inside him and everyone feared that it might never be put back in place.

"When're you gonna tell Sodapop?" Steve asked once Darry had returned. Darry ran a hand over his face.

"I dunno. I don't want him coming home yet. He's making so much progress."

"You gotta tell him, Dar," Two-Bit said.

"You know how ticked he'll be if you don't," Steve joined in. Darry sighed deeply and sat back in his chair.

"Yeah. I know."

There was silence for a few moments before Two-Bit spoke up. "What're you gonna do about him?"

Darry looked over at his friend, but he didn't need to ask who he was talking about. "I dunno, Two-Bit."

"I think he needs help. Like Sodapop's kinda help."

"I don't," Steve muttered.

"Why?" Darry asked. Steve looked down the dark hall, to where Ponyboy was assumingly sleeping, and let his gaze stay there for a few moments.

"I think he needs Sodapop."

XxX

Darry knew. He knew that Steve was right, that the person Ponyboy needed most was someone who wasn't here, but he couldn't do it. He couldn't find the nerve to pick up the phone and call Sodapop. Soda's program was almost over, but all Darry needed was a few days. He knew it would be enough to help Sodapop and then Sodapop could help him. Help Ponyboy. He didn't know what to do with Ponyboy. He didn't know how to help him.

Lucky enough for him, however, he didn't have to deal with much the next day. He'd been prepared for disaster, for Ponyboy to be a mess. He'd prepared for everything except what he got: Ponyboy sleeping.

Ponyboy didn't get up for breakfast, even when Darry had accidentally sent an avalanche of pots and pans slamming into the ground. It hadn't woken his little brother at all. When lunch rolled around and Two-Bit came by, Darry had gone into Ponyboy's room to make sure he was still alive.

"Ponyboy?" He asked from the doorway. Ponyboy's face was buried in his pillows as he laid on his stomach, face turned away from Darry. He noticed that Ponyboy had pushed all his blankets to the foot of the bed. When Ponyboy didn't respond, Darry let him be. He'd wake him later to make sure he'd eat.

"How's Ponyboy?" Two-Bit asked.

"Sleeping," Darry answered. "Want some lunch?"

"Sure." Two-Bit followed Darry into the kitchen. "Is he OK?"

"I think so." Darry handed him a plate. "He must just be tired. I bet it's taken a toll on him."

"Did you figure out when you're gonna tell Sodapop?"

Darry sighed. "Don't start with me, Two-Bit."

Two-Bit raised his hands in defense. "I was just asking."

"Sorry," Darry muttered. "I'm gonna wait till the weekend."

Two-Bit nodded and started loading some food onto his plate. "Steve's probably right. Ponyboy will be better when Sodapop's here."

"What if he's not?" Darry asked before he could stop himself. The question caught Two-Bit off guard.

"Never mind," Darry muttered. He wasn't expecting an answer anyway.

XxX

"Dar?"

It wasn't until the next day that Darry finally saw proof his little brother was alive. He looked up from his newspaper to see Ponyboy standing at the end of the hallway, rubbing his eyes.

"Hey," Darry set his paper down. "How do you feel?"

"Tired," Ponyboy said distractedly. "Did I…"

Darry eyed him. "What?"

Ponyboy shook his head. "What time is it?"

"Nearly dinner time. You hungry?"

The question seemed to roll through Ponyboy's brain for a few moments before he shrugged. This was more towards what Darry had been expecting. Still, he stood up and grabbed Ponyboy's arm lightly, taking him to the dining room. He didn't miss the way Ponyboy's flinched.

"Sit down," Darry said, leaving him at the table. Ponyboy did as he was told and sank down into a chair, waiting until Darry emerged from the kitchen a minute later with two plates. He set one down in front of Ponyboy and then took a seat.

"Eat as much as you can, all right?"

Ponyboy nodded and picked up his fork, but he didn't start into his meal. Darry shot worried looks at him every few minutes until Ponyboy couldn't stand it anymore. He scowled and scooped up some food, shoving it in his mouth to make some kind of point. It satisfied Darry, but unfortunately ended up being a mistake for Ponyboy. He dropped his fork a moment later and bowed his head, rubbing his forehead.

"Ponyboy?"

"I'm all right," Ponyboy said. "Just ate too fast."

Darry almost smirked. "Slow it down, then."

Ponyboy nodded. "Sure."

They continued on in silence for a few more moments. Darry wasn't sure what to say. Ponyboy was poking food on his plate, using his hand as a prop to rest his chin on and lean against the table. Darry felt his stomach churn. Ponyboy had been feet beneath the surface underneath Darry. He'd been in the ground, closed in, suffocating. No food. No water. No air.

Darry tried to remind himself it was only for a few moments. At least, the second time had been. He wasn't sure how long the first was.

"Darry?"

Darry snapped back to reality to find Ponyboy frowning. "What?"

"Are you OK?"

Darry was startled by the question. "Yeah. Why?"

"You look like you're daydreaming," Ponyboy said softly.

Darry shook his head. "Definitely not dreaming." No, this was a nightmare.

Ponyboy shrugged and continued to poke his food. Had he been given the proper amount of food at the house he'd stayed at? Darry remembered that he did look a little thin when he had returned.

He heard Ponyboy let out a strangled moan and shot his head up. Ponyboy was shoving his palms into his eyes, swallowing hard.

"What's wrong?" Darry asked quickly.

"I don't feel good," Ponyboy muttered. Darry realized he was crying.

"Ponyboy."

He leaned forward to rest his elbows on the table, palms still pushed into his eyes. Darry reached out and grabbed his shoulder, squeezing it gently. Darry wasn't convinced it was just because he didn't feel good that Ponyboy started crying.

"C'mon," Darry said gently, helping Ponyboy stand. He kept a hand on his back and lead his little brother back to his room. Ponyboy shook his head as they got close, wiping at his tears.

"I don't wanna go back in there," He said weakly. Darry stopped him and held onto both his shoulders, examining him at arm's length.

"Why?" He asked. "What's wrong?"

"I feel like…" Ponyboy dropped off his sentence, looking towards the ground. He ran the back of his hand under his nose, sniffing.

"Like what?" Darry prodded.

"I'm suffocating," Ponyboy finally said with a shrug. Darry felt his breath leave. He pulled Ponyboy forward into a crushing hug and held him tight. Darry understood.

He felt like he was suffocating, too.

XxX

"Sodapop?"

Sodapop groaned and rolled over in bed. He rubbed his eyes for a moment before looking at the person standing in his doorway.

"You have a phone call from your brother."

Sodapop looked over at the clock. Something was wrong. Darry wouldn't be calling this late if something wasn't wrong.

"He said it's important, but no one is hurt."

Sodapop sat up quickly and flung his covers off, running out the door after the person. He grabbed the phone in the hallway frantically.

"Darry, what's wrong?" He asked. "What happened? Is Ponyboy OK?"

"Calm down," Darry said. "Everyone's fine."

"Dar, it's three in the morning," Sodapop said impatiently. "If everyone was fine, why would you be calling?"

Sodapop heard Darry sigh. "Listen, there was a little…incident with Ponyboy. He ain't hurt. We just…um, found out about something that happened to him."

"What happened to him?"

Darry sighed again, this time in defeat. "Go get your stuff together. Tell the lady at the front desk I'm taking you home. I'll be there in twenty."

XxX

Darry threw Sodapop's bag into the back of the truck and came around the front where Sodapop was sitting impatiently.

"Tell me," He demanded as soon as Darry got in.

"Hang on, little buddy," Darry said, backing out of the parking lot and pulling onto the road. He waited until they were driving steady for a few minutes before he spoke again.

"You remember when we were in court a few days ago?" He waited until Sodapop nodded. "Well, while we were there, Ponyboy got spooked by the storm and ran off. We couldn't find him for a long time, but I finally found him in the lot."

"What was he doing?" Sodapop asked.

"Digging."

"Why?"

"I…I ain't sure, actually," Darry said. "But he wasn't here. At least not mentally. He kept saying Robert-the boyfriend at the house he stayed at-he was saying that Robert made him dig when he was bad."

"Dig what?"

"A hole," Darry said slowly. "Robert…he'd make Ponyboy…"

Sodapop examined him closely. "What, Darry? What did he make him do?"

"Lay down in it."

Sodapop's heart started beating fast. "Why?"

"To b-" Darry choked on his words and swallowed, gripping the steering wheel hard.

"Darry," Sodapop whispered. "What'd he do to Ponyboy?"

Darry finally took a breath and stared straight ahead at the road, not meeting Sodapop's look. "He…buried him, Sodapop."

"What?" Sodapop asked. "I...don't understand. Ponyboy ain't dead. How'd Robert bury him?"

"Sodapop…" Darry sighed.

"He buried him alive?" He asked. "He _buried _him alive? How…how did he…"

"He gave Ponyboy a straw to breathe through so he wouldn't suffocate. Jacob dug him out both times."

Sodapop looked out the window, deathly quiet. He seemed to get it. His little brother had been tortured, buried alive; stuck under the ground unable to move and unable to push the weight of the soil filling in all around him. It was Sodapop's worst fear, and Ponyboy had lived it.

Darry glanced over at him. "Sodapop?"

Tears spilled over Soda's eyes. Darry didn't know what to say. For the first time, he just didn't know what to say.

"I…" Sodapop's voice trembled and he let out a sob. He swallowed hard and took a few shuddering breaths.

"It's ok," Darry said, reaching over and squeezing his shoulder.

"How could they…" Sodapop started, but broke down in sobs. Darry checked his mirror and pulled off onto the side of the road. What Darry knew, and most people didn't realize, was that Sodapop was just as sensitive and emotional as Ponyboy. And sure, Sodapop may have worked full time, he may have helped pay the bills, and he may have been part of what held their fragile household together, but he was a child. And just like with Ponyboy, Darry had forgotten.

He grabbed Sodapop close. "I know, Pepsi Cola. I know."

"I'll kill him," Sodapop whispered through tremors. "I'll kill that bastard for what he did to Pony."

Sodapop closed his eyes.

He'd do it.

He'd kill Robert for what he'd done.


	15. Chapter 15

**Thanks so much for all the support with this story! It's so incredible and I just love hearing from you guys!**

**This is a little bit of a fluff chapter for you guys to cut some tension. It has a moment at the end that's a bit like another one of my stories, but I just loooovvveee them :)  
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**Enjoy!  
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><p>"How long has he been sleeping?" Sodapop asked as he and Darry stood in the doorway to Darry's room, the light from the hall illuminating the bed enough to let them see Ponyboy's sleeping form.<p>

"A few hours. He got sick at dinner."

"Why's he in your room?"

"Said he felt like he was suffocating in his," Darry said. "My room's bigger. Thought it might help."

Darry grabbed Sodapop's arm and dragged him away from the room, shutting the door. "C'mon."

Sodapop followed Darry out into the living room and sat down on the couch, burying his face into his hands. "Do Two-Bit and Steve know?"

Darry hesitated for a moment before nodding. "Yeah."

Sodapop shot his head up angrily. "They knew before me?"

"There was nothing I could do, Sodapop. They were both here when I found Ponyboy and brought him back. He was a mess. I couldn't not tell them what happened."

"I should've been here," Sodapop whispered. "I could've helped."

"You should've been where you were," Darry retorted. "_You_ needed help."

Sodapop glared at him, but didn't say anything. Darry knew he was upset and there was nothing he could do. Sodapop was protective over Ponyboy-no one could deny that-and he would probably never get over the fact that he hadn't been home when Ponyboy needed him. Just like Darry would never get over the fact that he had let it happen.

"Ponyboy will be all right," Darry heard himself saying. He wasn't sure why he was. He had no idea if Ponyboy would be fine or not. It just seemed like the right thing to say to his distraught brother.

"Did you call anyone?" Sodapop asked, ignoring him. Darry wondered if he had said his previous sentence out loud or not.

He nodded. "I called Mrs. O'Donovan. She's the one that got you a case at the courthouse."

"I like her," Sodapop said.

Darry nodded again and wrung his hands together. He examined Sodapop carefully. "How're you doing, Sodapop?"

Soda looked up at him curiously. "I'm fine, Dar. Why?"

"I mean how're you _doing_?" Darry tried again. "With…everything?"

"Oh." Sodapop sank back into the couch. "I'm better. Kasey says I still gots a ways to go, but I feel better, so I ain't complaining."

"I'm glad."

Sodapop sat forward. "How're _you _doing?"

"Me?" Darry asked.

Sodapop nodded. "Honestly."

"I'm fine," Darry said. "Just…ready for all this to be over."

Sodapop frowned, but let the answer slide. He stood up and stretched his arms, making a move towards the hall.

"Where're you going?" Darry asked, standing up as well.

"I was just-"

"Don't even think about it."

"Darry," Sodapop whined, letting his arms drop to his side. "C'mon."

"Don't you dare go wake him up, Sodapop," Darry said sternly. Sodapop gave him a pouting face, making Darry smile.

"What?" Sodapop asked defensively. Darry shook his head, waving off the question. It was nice to see Sodapop act like a child again.

"Wait till he wakes up on his own. It was hard enough getting him to sleep."

"Can't I go sleep with him?" Sodapop asked. Darry shook his head again.

"I'd rather you didn't just yet. Just leave him be."

"Aw, jeeze, Dar," Sodapop grumbled. "Ruin everything."

Darry raised his eyebrows in amusement. "Go to bed, little buddy."

"Where're you sleeping?" Sodapop wondered.

"Wherever I want," Darry replied, pushing him forward. "Now go."

Sodapop rolled his eyes, but did as he was told, casting a final glance down the hall at Darry's room. He sighed and headed off. He wanted to see Ponyboy really bad, but he knew Darry was right about not waking him.

Darry didn't sleep that night. He had no intentions of doing so. He was too busy trying to figure out what would happen with Ponyboy. Would he need to go to court and testify? Would he have to see Robert again? Would they have enough proof to lock Robert away?

The answers to those questions would come in time. He knew that, but he couldn't help but worry as he listened to the rain falling down outside. His dad used to love the rain. It was one thing he and Darry had in common. Darry didn't like the rain anymore, though. It only made him think of Ponyboy, his fingers bleeding, sobbing, clawing through the dirt.

A loud boom shook the house and two things seemed to happen at the same time; first, the house was submerged into sudden darkness, and then a cry rang out from his room. Darry scrambled to his feet and stumbled to the kitchen, trying to find the flashlight.

"Darry!"

He cursed under his breath. Ponyboy was trying to find him. He could hear his little brother running into things.

"Stay there, Ponyboy!" He called back. He found the drawer he was looking for and yanked it open, grabbing the flashlight. He flipped it on and took off through the house. He got to his room and flung the door open, shining the light around. Ponyboy was sitting on the floor next to the dresser, his legs pulled up to his chest and his arms wrapped tight around them.

"Ponyboy." Darry hurried over to him and dropped to his knees. Ponyboy was trembling, biting back tears.

"It's ok," Darry said, putting an arm around him. "It's ok."

He felt Ponyboy nod. "I-I j-just…"

"I know," Darry said gently. "C'mon."

He grabbed Ponyboy's arm and pulled him to his feet, shoving the flashlight into his hands. This seemed to ease some of Ponyboy's anxiousness. They started down the hall. Darry wasn't sure why Sodapop hadn't woken up, but he let him be. He steered Ponyboy off course so they could go into the kitchen.

"Shine the light over here so I can find some candles."

Ten minutes later he had the living room lit up and his little brother on the couch, clutching the flashlight to his chest in case he would need it. Darry sat down next to him as another round of thunder shook the house. Ponyboy held his breath and shut his eyes tight.

"Nothing's gonna hurt you, Ponyboy," Darry said, squeezing his shoulder. "Ain't nothing but a little thunder. It's kind of like being at the bowling alley, right?"

Ponyboy nodded stiffly and opened his eyes. "I guess."

"Just imagine someone's getting a strike."

Ponyboy bit his lip and looked down the hall. "Darry?"

"Yeah?"

"Who…" Ponyboy stopped for a moment to take a shaky breath. Darry looked at him in concern. "Who's in Sodapop's room?"

Darry almost smiled. "Sodapop's in Sodapop's room."

Ponyboy looked at him quickly, his eyebrows raised. "Soda's home?"

"Got here while you were sleeping," Darry said. He nudged him. "Wanna go wake him up?"

Ponyboy smiled and nodded.

"Turn your light on," Darry instructed as they got to their feet. Ponyboy did as he was told and followed Darry. When they got to Sodapop's room, Darry quietly opened the door and motioned him inside.

"Give me the light," Darry whispered. Ponyboy handed it over to him. "Go jump on him."

Ponyboy gave him a look. "He won't like attack me, right?"

"Course not. He never has before."

Ponyboy shrugged. "I was just making sure."

"Just go," Darry laughed. Ponyboy smiled and braced himself to get a running start before launching onto Soda's bed. The sudden action made his brother wake with a start, but he immediately recognized Ponyboy and turned on him, pinning him down and tickling his sides. Ponyboy burst into a fit of laughter, gasping for Sodapop to release him, but Soda ignored him until Ponyboy couldn't breath anymore and then let him go.

"Hey kiddo," Sodapop said with a smile.

"H-hey Soda," Ponyboy gasped, trying to get his breathing back to normal. Sodapop looked at the door where Darry was watching with amusement.

"What's with the flashlight?" Soda asked.

"Power's out," Darry informed him.

"Oh." Sodapop glanced down at his little brother, who was pushing himself into a sitting position. "You know, Dar, he doesn't look near as fragile as you made him out to be."

"Darry!" Ponyboy complained.

Darry shrugged. "I call them as I see them, bud."

Sodapop laughed and pulled Ponyboy into a hug. "I missed you, kid."

"I missed you, too," Ponyboy said. "Are you better now?"

Sodapop nodded. "Yeah." He tightened his hold on hi_s _little brother and buried his face into Ponyboy's hair. "I am now."


	16. Chapter 16

**Another fluff kind of chapter for ya. The next chapter might be the last one, so just be prepared :)**

**Thanks for all the support! Sorry for making you wait. Please ignore any typos :)  
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**Enjoy.  
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Darry, Sodapop, and Ponyboy sat out in the living room for hours, talking, laughing, and having a good time. Sodapop and Darry tried to keep Ponyboy distracted from the thunder and lack of light, but from time to time, when the thunder would clap, his body would stiffen and his face would flush. Sodapop would just rub his arm gently and keep him talking.

It wasn't long before Ponyboy grew tired and drifted off with his head resting on the arm of the couch, listening to his brothers banter. It made him feel content. Not alone. Both of his brothers next to him was just the way it should be.

Darry smiled when he noticed Ponyboy asleep. The candles were burning low and he knew they wouldn't last much longer. He grabbed Sodapop and pulled him to the kitchen so they wouldn't wake Ponyboy while they searched for more candles.

"Do we even have more?" Sodapop asked.

"I dunno," Darry muttered, searching through a drawer. "Mom always kept a bunch."

"Yeah, I think they're all burning out in the living room."

Darry ignored him. "I'm gonna go check mom's room. Go into mine and see if there are any in the box on the floor in the closet."

"Should I use my night vision to see?" Sodapop asked. Darry rolled his eyes and handed him a flashlight.

"You should use your mouth to shut up," He replied. Sodapop grinned and headed off. He was able to get through the house pretty easily without seeing. He had had it memorized since he was little and would sneak out of his room to go to the kitchen and get sweets.

He pushed open Darry's door and found his way to the closet, shining the light to search for the box. He dug through it without concern, searching for the candles, when he suddenly found something else. It was a long black box, one he had seen only a few times before. He dropped to his knees and set his flashlight down so he could still see while he slowly opened the box.

He let out a breath. It was his mom's pearl necklace. He remembered it well. All of the boys had given it to her one mother's day a long time ago. She wore it until the clasp broke and it wouldn't stay on. Sodapop had meant to get it fixed one day, but he never did.

He felt tears in his eyes and set the necklace aside. He picked up his light and started through the box again. It was full of his parents stuff.

"Did you find any candles?" Darry called down the hall. Sodapop opened his mouth, but couldn't speak. He was too overwhelmed with emotions.

Darry was in the room a second later. "Soda?" He kneeled down next to Sodapop. Soda handed him the object in his hand wordlessly.

Even in the dim lighting, Soda could see Darry smile and caress the object gently. He spoke in a soft voice, his mind filled with memories. "This was dad's."

Sodapop nodded. "I didn't know this stuff was here."

Darry put the object back in the box and picked through a few things. "I forgot about it. I don't usually look through their stuff."

"Usually," Sodapop said with a teary smile. Darry sat down and put an arm around him, pulling him close.

"You know, mom hated this," Darry laughed, showing Sodapop a small heart shaped pendant.

"She did?" Sodapop took it from it. "But she wore it all the time."

"Only when we went to see grandma cause she bought it for her. Mom thought it was too flashy."

Sodapop chuckled. "It is pretty flashy."

He set it back in the box and picked up a watch. It had stopped ticking a long time ago and the face of it was cracked. "Member when we bought dad this?"

Darry nodded. "It sure didn't last long. You had it broken within a month."

"I did not!" Soda said defensively. "That was Ponyboy's fault."

"You blamed Ponyboy for everything," Darry said, taking the watch from him. "We all knew it was you."

Sodapop let out a huff. "That one really was him."

"Uh huh."

Sodapop rolled his eyes and bit his lip. "Do you ever miss them, Darry?"

Darry set the watch back in the box and nodded. "All the time, little buddy."

From somewhere else in the house, an object suddenly shattered. There was a loud bang, followed by a cry. "_DARRY!_"

Darry swore and grabbed his flashlight, scrambling to his feet. He raced down the hall, Sodapop close on his heels. The candles had gone out and there was no light in the living room anymore. Darry shined his light and realized something had broken the window. Wind was blowing the curtains around and glass was covering the couch and everything around it.

Ponyboy was on that couch, his hands covering his head.

"Ponyboy!" Sodapop cried. "Don't move."

Ponyboy was shaking, sobbing silently. "D-don't let him k-kill me."

"No one's gonna kill you," Darry said quickly, looking for his shoes.

"Is it a tornado?" Sodapop asked urgently over the wind.

"I dunno," Darry called. He found his shoes and slid them on, hurrying to Ponyboy. He crunched over the glass and scooped his little brother up in his arms. Something slammed into the house. "Get to the bathroom!"

"Shouldn't we go to the closet?"

"GO!" Darry bellowed. Sodapop ran, Darry following right behind. He burst into the bathroom.

"Get in the tub," Darry said, setting Ponyboy on his feet. Sodapop stepped inside and then reached out to grab Ponyboy, pulling him forward.

"Stay there," Darry commanded once they were both sitting down. He spun on his heel and hurried from the room.

"Darry!" Ponyboy cried. Sodapop held him tightly as thunder shook the house.

"He'll be back," He said shakily. He had no idea what Darry was doing, though.

A minute later, Darry raced back into the bathroom with a few thick couch cushions. He closed the door and slid in the tub next to his brothers. He gave them each a cushion as they huddled together.

"Make sure you're covered," He said. They each braced themselves as the house shook again.

"Soda," Ponyboy whined. Sodapop pulled him close.

"It's ok," He murmured. "Darry and me will protect you."

Ponyboy nodded against him.

Darry wasn't sure how long the storm lasted, but they stayed in the bathroom until it was over. He and Sodapop told stories to pass the time and calm Ponyboy down, who was stuck somewhere between reality and a flashback. Every once and a while he would forget where he was and what was really happening.

Darry made his brothers stay put while he checked the damage. Other than the debris that had blown through the shattered window, nothing was serious. Darry called them out while he went outside to check. If it had been a tornado, they hadn't gotten the worst of it. The sun rising showed tree branches and leaves that littered the road. No one's house was damaged or destroyed.

"Anything broken?" Sodapop called from the porch.

"Nope." Darry retreated back up the steps. "Must have just been a bad storm. Where's Ponyboy?"

"He's making sure nothing in his room is damaged."

Darry followed him back into the house. "I gotta clean this broken glass up."

"I'll get it," Sodapop offered.

"You ain't wearing shoes, little buddy. Just let me get it. Go check on Ponyboy."

"Sure thing." Soda headed off down the hall. He stepped into Ponyboy's doorway and looked around. Ponyboy was sitting on his bed, back faced towards him. Even though Soda couldn't see his face, he could tell he was crying.

"Pone?" Soda asked gently. Ponyboy didn't move. Sodapop walked over and sat down next to him. He noticed that Ponyboy was cradling something in his shaking hands. It was the book Johnny gave him.

"What's a matter?"

Ponyboy shook his head and wiped at his tears. "I was just remembering."

"Johnny?" Sodapop gently took the book from him and set it aside.

"He didn't like storms either. He wasn't a baby about them, though."

"You ain't a baby, Ponyboy," Sodapop chided. "You were both scared of storms for different reasons. You have a right to be scared."

Ponyboy shrugged, but the tears still poured from his eyes. Sodapop reached up and wiped away a tear gently.

"You ain't leaving again, are you?" Ponyboy asked suddenly. Sodapop frowned.

"Of course not, Ponyboy. Why're you asking?"

"I dunno," Ponyboy whispered, wringing his hands together. Sodapop pulled him into a hug.

"I ain't leaving," He said gently. "I'm here now. Everything's gonna be OK."

Ponyboy nodded. For the first time in a long time, he was starting to believe Sodapop was right.


	17. Chapter 17

**Um...did anyone else forget that I didn't finish this story? Haha**

**Well...here's the end. I had a lot of fun with this story and I appreciate all the support you guys gave me!  
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**Thanks so much for reading and for all you guys do to make me feel awesome :)  
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**So...here we go...  
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**Enjoy. :)  
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Ponyboy burst into a fit of laughter as a cloud of white powder filled the kitchen. Sodapop stood frozen for a moment, looking down at the flower bag that had slipped from his hands. It took a second for him to comprehend what had happened.

"You think that's funny, huh?" Sodapop asked, turning around. Ponyboy nodded through his laughter. Sodapop leaned down and scooped up a handful of flower, silencing Ponyboy quickly.

"Don't you dare," Ponyboy said, backing up. Sodapop smiled wickedly at him.

"Sodapop!"

But it was too late. Ponyboy was hit in the face by Sodapop's flower ball. He coughed and rubbed the powder out of his eyes before grinning.

"You're gonna regret that."

Sodapop laughed and turned quickly, moving to run from the kitchen. Instead, he slipped on the flower covering the floor and lost his footing, crashing into the ground.

When Darry got home an hour later, he found both of them sitting in the kitchen, covered in flower, talking and laughing. He wanted to be mad- - he really did, because the flower was _everywhere_- - but he couldn't. It had been so long since he'd seen Sodapop and Ponyboy having fun together.

Darry knew that it would take a long time before things were ever really okay again. There would still be times when Sodapop lost control of his anger and would yell at someone. There would still be times when Ponyboy would hang around Darry, afraid to be out of his sight.

But Darry couldn't ask for anything better.

Because he had both his brothers. They were alive and they were safe. Darry understood how close he had been to losing them forever. He would never be so careless again.

XxX

"Darry, I don't want to."

"C'mon, Pone. You can do it."

"Darry!" Ponyboy whined.

Darry sighed and put a hand on his shoulder. He wasn't sure if it was the heat outside or Ponyboy's intense fear of going into the backyard that was making the boy sweat, but either way, Darry could feel the dampness through his shirt.

"You've been talking to that therapist about it, right?" Darry asked.

"Kind of," Ponyboy muttered.

Darry raised an eyebrow. "So you're saying I'm sending you five days a week to a therapist who doesn't talk about your problems?"

"Aw, Darry," Ponyboy moaned, smearing his face with his hands. "'Course we talk about it, but we've never actually talked about me going _into_ the backyard."

"Do you trust me, Ponyboy?"

He threw his hands up in exasperation. "Not really!"

"Ponyboy," Darry said sternly. Ponyboy sighed and ran a hand back through his hair.

"Yeah, I trust you, Dar. Of course I do."

"Then _trust_ me." Darry stuck his hand out, waiting patiently. "Nothing is gonna happen."

Ponyboy hesitated and looked down at Darry's hand before shaking his head, taking a step back. "I can't do it. I can't."

Darry let his arm fall to his side. "Ponyboy, you're never going to get over this unless you can face your fears and realize it's not gonna happen again. I won't make you do this today, but you need to realize that as long as you tell yourself you can't do it, you won't be able to."

Ponyboy silently watched him walk away. He let out a breath and stared into the backyard. He knew Darry was right, but he wasn't ready to face it.

XxX

A hand on his shoulder brought him to reality and he stumbled backwards. Someone grabbed him to steady him.

"Take it easy, Pone."

Ponyboy blew out a breath and looked at his friend. "You scared me."

"Clearly," Two-Bit said, letting him go. "What're you doing out here?"

Ponyboy frowned. It was one of those rare moments when Two-Bit was serious, though Ponyboy couldn't figure out why. "I was just…"

But Ponyboy couldn't explain. Darry had tried taking him into the backyard three days ago, and every night since then Ponyboy had tried to venture back there himself, but would always get stuck in the side yard. Darry thought he could do it, but Ponyboy was starting to think he was wrong.

"Trying to go into the backyard?" Two-Bit offered. Ponyboy nodded and looked down. "Why?"

"I dunno," Ponyboy mumbled, kicking a rock by his foot. "Darry said…"

"Darry says a lot of stuff," Two-Bit said. "Don't do it for him. Do it for you. Go when _you're_ ready."

"What if I'm never ready?" Ponyboy asked. "What if I'll never be able to go into the backyard?"

"Well, then we'll have Darry move someplace without a backyard," Two-Bit laughed, ruffling Ponyboy's hair. "You'll be ready for it one day, Ponyboy. And when that day comes, we'll all be here for you."

Ponyboy sighed and rubbed his eyes. "I don't like when you're serious. You know that, right?"

Two-Bit cracked a smile and nudged him in the ribs. "I know. I like to keep you on your toes."

XxX

"_Please," Ponyboy begged, pulling against the hand dragging him. "I won't do it no more. Please."_

"_Actions have consequences, Ponyboy," Robert said. He pushed the backdoor open and dragged Ponyboy out. The hole that he had made Ponyboy dig the last time was only half full with dirt now. Still, he threw Ponyboy forward and gave him the shovel._

"_Dig," He demanded. Ponyboy held the shovel with shaking hands. He didn't move._

"_Dig, damn it!" Robert backhanded Ponyboy across the face, sending him a view steps over. Ponyboy bit back tears and rubbed his cheek before doing as he was told. When he was done, Robert grabbed the shovel from him and pushed him into the hole. _

"_Lay down," He said. The tears spilled over Ponyboy's eyes. _

"_Please," He begged again. Robert moved to hit him with the shovel. Ponyboy raised his hands in surrender and laid down, trying to hold back his sobs as Robert started piling dirt over him. _

_The whole time Robert was rambling, talking about how much of a problem Ponyboy was. Ponyboy tried not to let it get to him. _Robert is drunk_, he told himself, _he doesn't mean it_. _

_It still hurt, though. _

_Robert gave Ponyboy a straw and started to cover his face. Ponyboy closed his eyes._

"Ponyboy!"

He let out a strangled gasp as his eyes opened. His pupils moved around wildly in the dark, trying to grasp the sudden change of atmosphere.

"It's okay," Sodapop said, stroking his hair gently. "You're okay."

Ponyboy sank back into his pillows and shoved his palms into his eyes, breathing hard. He felt Sodapop sit down on the bed next to him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I told Darry," Sodapop was muttering to himself. "Told him you weren't ready to back there."

Ponyboy moved his hands and looked at him. "Soda."

"Yeah," Sodapop said softly. "Are you okay?"

"What time is it?" Ponyboy asked, pushing himself up into a sitting position.

"Around midnight."

Ponyboy looked down at his hands and took a deep breath. "I'm fine, Soda. Just tired."

Sodapop patted his shoulder. "Let's go back to sleep."

Ponyboy nodded and laid down, but he had no intentions of going back to sleep. He waited until he heard the soft breathing of his brother next to him before rolling out of bed. He knew what he needed to do and if he ever was going to do it, it was going to be now.

Quietly, Ponyboy slid on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt before leaving the room. In a daze, he walked through the hall and into the living room. He didn't bother with shoes or a coat. He knew if he stopped now, he would never start again. So he yanked open the front door and stepped outside.

To this day, Ponyboy still isn't sure why he didn't go out the backdoor. Nevertheless, he made his way around the house in the dark. He hesitated at the side yard, like he always did, and took a deep breath.

Then he stepped into the backyard.

"_Dig, damn it!" _

Ponyboy sucked in a large breath and took another step.

"_C'mon, kid. Stay with me. Open your eyes."_

Ponyboy felt tears running down his cheeks. He took another step and sank to his knees, running his fingers over the grass.

_Someone pumped his chest. Hard. _

"_C'mon, kid," They muttered desperately. Ponyboy started into a fit of coughing, gasping for air._

"_J-Jacob?" He asked weakly. _

"_Yeah. Shit, Ponyboy. Are you okay?"_

Ponyboy closed his eyes and slammed his fist into the ground. Everything swirled inside him. Robert had hit him, called him names, made him feel worthless. He was the reason Ponyboy couldn't sleep at night. The reason Ponyboy hated the dark. He had taken him outside when he was drunk and buried him alive.

Robert had ruined his life.

He felt a sob build up inside of him and he leaned forward onto his hands. A strangled scream escaped his throat.

"I hate you," he whispered, choking back another sob. "I hate what you've made me become."

The sky above him groaned softly as clouds continued to float by, and he cursed them. Tears were falling down his cheeks and his body shook from both the cold and the rage he had stored up inside him. He yelled at the wind. Everything he felt towards Robert, towards that house he stayed in, finally made its way out of him. He sobbed the remaining heartbreak away until he fell asleep nearly twenty minutes later.

He woke to the feeling of someone carrying him. Above him, light blue was slowly seeping into the dark sky.

"Darry?" He asked groggily, recognizing the strong hold of his older brother's arms. "What're you doing?"

"What're _you_ doing, kiddo? It's freezing out here."

"I don't…" Ponyboy started, trying to get his head together. "I was in the backyard."

"I know."

"No, Darry," Ponyboy prodded sleepily. "I was in the backyard."

"I know, kiddo," Darry said gently. "I'm real proud of you. You faced your fears."

"And came out alive," Ponyboy mumbled.

"And came out alive," Darry agreed, sighing to himself. "I wish you would have faced your fears during the day, though. You're gonna catch pneumonia."

Ponyboy smiled and leaned against Darry's shoulder. "You worry a lot."

Darry kicked the door open and shut it behind him. "You kind of give me a lot of reasons to, kid."

Ponyboy laughed and closed his eyes. "I'll work on it."

"I'm sure you will," Darry said, his voice light with sarcasm.

"Dar," Ponyboy tugged on his arm, wiggling from his grasp. "Don't wake Sodapop, 'kay? He's tired."

"_You're _tired, Ponyboy." Darry set him down and put a hand on his back, leading him down the hall. "Here, you can sleep in my room."

He opened the door and gently pushed Ponyboy inside. "Go get under the covers. I'm gonna grab a few more blankets."

Ponyboy did as he was told and crawled into bed. He snuggled close to a pillow that smelled like Darry and found an odd sense of comfort in that. Taking in a deep breath, he closed his eyes. Darry was back only a moment later, piling on a few blankets while muttering to himself. Ponyboy smiled and drifted off to sleep, feeling- - for the first time in a long time- - content.

XxX

Darry knew. He knew that things would never be the way they were before. He knew that he had messed up, but he was finally beginning to accept it. Things were still rough, but they were better. Ponyboy laughed now. Sodapop's eyes danced the way they used to. And Darry…well, he had plastered over the hole in the wall, and in turn, the hole in his chest was finally beginning to fill.

No one was perfectly fine, but they were getting better. That was all Darry could ask for. It would take therapy, patience, love, and time before both his brothers were all right again. Darry was willing to wait. He was willing to do whatever he could to make things okay.

He had spent six and a half months without the most important people in his life. One hundred and ninety-five days fighting to get them back. Four thousand six hundred and eighty hours regretting his choice to be so stupid. Sixteen million eight hundred and forty eight thousand seconds realizing what he lost.

He had to let it go. Sure, there were days he still felt guilty- - days when Ponyboy would wake up crying or Sodapop would go tense- - but Darry had learned to live with his mistake. And while he'll never forget what he did, he began to understand it, because it taught him how strong long can be. It brought his family closer together.

Even though time has passed, they won't forget. Six and a half months of secrets, pain, loneliness, and heartbreak. They're all moving on, but everyone still remembers those one hundred and ninety-five days that had separated them. The days that had broken them. The days that had made them appreciate each other and reminded them what it really meant to be a family.

They were the days that changed everything.

XxX

"Ponyboy, there's something you haven't told me," Amanda said slowly. Ponyboy looked at his therapist curiously.

"What?"

"Darry sounds very protective of you and Sodapop."

Ponyboy nodded. "Yeah, he is."

"So, what exactly did he do to get you boys taken away?"

"That," Ponyboy laughed, rubbing his eyes, "Is an entirely different story."


End file.
